02/06/2013 12:13 pm ET

Being Gay Is Not A Choice, Says Nate Berkus (VIDEO)

They've done dozens of shows together, but Oprah and Nate Berkus have never had a conversation like this. On "Super Soul Sunday," Nate talks to Oprah about coming out, the cancellation of his talk show and his new book, The Things That Matter.

In this clip, Nate talks about sitting his father down and explaining to him that being gay is not a choice.

"The truth of the matter is... that being gay is the way that I was born," says Nate. "I believe this to the core of my being. I would never choose something to make my life complicated. I said, 'Dad, we're never going to have a relationship -- a real relationship -- unless you believe me and I know that you believe me and act accordingly.'"

Nate says he had an aha moment when his father said he wasn't placing as much importance on Nate's being gay as Nate was.

"'I do love you, I do respect you, I do admire you,'" Nate says his father told him. "'If you say that you were born this way, and you didn't make a choice, then we're good.'"

That was a defining moment in their relationship because "I knew that if I had his base level of respect, I could move forward," Nate says.

Watch Oprah's interview with Nate Berkus at 11 a.m. ET Feb. 10 on "Super Soul Sunday" on OWN.



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