11/05/2013 03:11 pm ET

Bacon and BMWs: Men Tell Us What It Means to 'Have It All'


Uuuuuuuuugh, "having it all." Enough already, right? I'm so goddamn sick of talking about "having it all" and who can "have it all" and what "it all" even means and whether wanting "it all" is the ultimate feminist goalpost or if it's just a reductive construct meant to keep women dissatisfied, unfulfilled, and cheerfully night-vacuuming for their entire lives. Yawn/barf. But a recent survey—which found that men and women have very different visions of what "having it all" means—actually got me intrigued. This is a concept that's discussed almost exclusively within a feminine framework, so what would it look like for a dude to "have it all"?

According to the survey—published last week by Citi and LinkedIn—79% of men think that "a strong, loving marriage" is essential to the concept of "having it all," while only 66% of women feel the same way. And over just the past 15 months, the number of women who don't factor any form of relationship or romance into their definition of success has doubled. All of that indicates, in the Atlantic Wire's estimation, that "men have a more specific and simpler definition of success, while women have more fluid goals (and, not coincidentally, far more hurdles to climbing the career ladder)."

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