08/08/2014 09:20 am ET Updated Aug 08, 2014

Why Do Guys Spread Their Legs When Sitting On The Subway? My Weekend Of Sitting Like A Man

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There are only a few sure things we can count on in this crazy, ever-changing world: The moon’s regal orbit around the Earth. The gentle change of the seasons. And the fact that on any given subway car, there will be at least one man with his legs spread across multiple seats.

A problem as frustrating as it is mysterious, the man who takes up multiple seats on public transit with his splayed-out legs inspires all sorts of questions among his fellow riders: Is the leg-spreader exercising his male privilege, or, as some defenders would have you believe, merely attending to the unique spacial requirements of his balls? Is he blocking off empty seats to his left and his right with his knees out of obliviousness, or passive-aggressive malice?

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