Throughout the next few months, HuffPost Teen is highlighting the way teens think and feel about sex through anecdotes written for our series, "Teen Sex: It's Complicated." All of the authors are teenagers who have agreed to be published anonymously. If you want to share your thoughts, join the conversation here.
By Maggie, 16
I am a 16-year-old California native. To me, sex is a way of self-expression. It’s an art form. It’s the oldest, most carnal way of letting out your emotions. And that’s what America fails to understand.
The American attitude towards sex is disfigured because we fail to look at sex objectively, to take it purely at face value. Our problem is that we always have to classify sex along with something else: gay sex, interracial sex, sex for trade, etc. We pass judgements because of these pointless classifications. She’s having sex with a rich man? She must want his money. She’s having sex with an older man? She must have daddy issues. He’s having sex with a girl who’s much younger than him? He must be really desperate.
But when you strip away the other lenses, sex by itself is a beautiful thing. It’s empowering. Poetic. Life-changing. An adventure. Pure nirvana.
However, it’s nearly impossible to look at sex objectively because of the sex education in America. Abstinence only education fails for one reason: You tell teenagers explicitly not to do something, chances are most of them will do the opposite. And this is no bullshit -- America has the highest teen pregnancy rate in the developed world because of our subpar sex education. Look it up if you don’t believe me.
I’m tired of sex being such a taboo subject in America. It’s time for us to start educating the youth on something so essential to life. Instead of screaming, “ABSTINENCE” and then shutting the door on the conversation, we need to plan for everything. Give out condoms. Make birth control more available. Be open and honest with your children about sex.
Sex is supposed to be fun. It relieves stress, keeps your heart healthy, and helps you sleep at night. I hope with ardent fervor that the next generation grows up sexually open-minded, passing no judgements based on sex or sexual partners (quantity or quality), that they grow up without double standards, and that they outgrow rape culture.
The most important thing to remember about sex is who it’s about: you and your partner. It doesn’t matter what the naysayers think. Your comfort and safety are always number one, and no means f****** no.
---Read more from "Teen Sex: It's Complicated":
- "I Wish I Had Loved Myself Enough To Wait For Sex"
- "Confessions Of A Half-Virgin"
- "Why I Lie About Being A Virgin"
- "I Became Hell-Bent On Losing My Virginity"
- "I Had A Baby At 14, And Here's What I Now Know About Sex"
- "Why I Now Feel Confident, Not Terrified, About Losing My Virginity"
- "I'm Gay, But I Don't Regret Having Sex With My High School Girlfriend"
- "I'm Demisexual -- Here's What That Means"
- "What Losing My Virginity Made Me Realize"
- "My 'First Time' Was Really Embarrassing"
- "I Wanted To Wait For Marriage -- Then I Changed My Mind"
- "Sex Was Mysterious, Intriguing And Terrifying"
- "I Expected A Monumental Change In Myself After Sex"
- "Immediately After Sex, He Stopped Talking To Me"
- "The Act Of Sex Scares Me"
- "I Slept Around Because Sex Didn't Feel Like A Big Deal"
- "Being A Virgin Sucks, But I'm Still Waiting"
- "There's No One I Can Talk To About Sex"
- "In Eighth Grade, I Signed A Celibacy Contract"
- "I Feel Like I'm The Only One Who Doesn't Regret Having Sex"
- "I Thought I Was Ready To Lose My Virginity"
- "Sex Is A Symbol Of Popularity At My School"
- "It Seemed Like Sex Was Some Kind Of Boulder Hanging Over Us"
- "I Argue With Myself Every Day About Losing My Virginity"
- "I'm Staying A Virgin So I Don't Disappoint My Family"
- "Sex Was Nothing To Me"
- "Sometimes, I Don't Know What To Believe When It Comes To Sex"