05/11/2010 05:12 am ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

It's Time for a DJ Intervention (VIDEO)

If it's true that 'Anyone Can Play Guitar' then it's even more true that anyone can DJ, especially when you can download Serato for free or plug your iPod into a sound system. Live by the Apple, die by the Apple.

In today's club scene a dilettante hipster can get paid four or five thousand dollars and show up with their iTunes play list, instead of having skills, just because they screwed someone famous and the promoter thinks that's cool and bitchin' and shit. That's fine and all, but there are these people who used to do this for a living. Called DJs.

OK, the novelty of seeing the cast of Gossip Girl fumble around with a mixer might be an initial draw but then what? I'll tell you what. If it's a nightclub with a dance floor, the real DJ has to come in and save their ass and make sure there's actual music playing.

I'm not saying that every celebrity sucks at DJing. Some actually have been doing it for years and use both records and the updated technology. It seems to me those people have a real love for it and put a lot of time and energy into it. Therein lies the difference. Are you in it because you love it? Or are you doing it for the photo op? Cause most of us can tell, you know.

Club owners: Stop paying good money for crappy product. You want the cast of Twilight to DJ your party? Don't pay them. They're not DJs. You wouldn't let them 'guest operate' on your grandma's gall bladder would you? You can give them a bottle of Grey Goose and set them up in a booth in the corner, but don't let them on the decks. Leave the DJing to someone with chops.

It's time for a DJ INTERVENTION.

Pass it on to all of your friends who may need some help. We know you're out there and we want you to get the help you deserve...


DJ Intervention, Part One

DJ Intervention, Part Two