07/01/2013 04:59 pm ET Updated Feb 02, 2016

My Big Fat Gay Honeymoon

Following our Big Fat Gay Wedding, we did what many happy newlyweds do; we took to the skies to our honeymoon destination, Turks & Caicos. Nestled in the Caribbean just 500 miles from the Florida coast, Turks is an idyllic setting for a romantic getaway with pristine beaches marked by cream-colored sand and calm, blue waters, and delicious local food and fine dining. Most importantly, Turks is less developed than many of its neighboring islands that tourists frequent and offers an especially quiet and relaxing (and much-needed!) off-season vacation.

As seasoned travelers, the wife and I have explored some of the most homophobic and gay-friendly dots on the globe. For our honeymoon, we made a conscious decision not to choose somewhere based exclusively on either beauty or tolerance, but to settle on somewhere in between that was both aesthetically pleasing and where fear wouldn't be a factor.

British colonized and frequented by Europeans and Americans, we figured we weren't in danger of being arrested or murdered for presenting as a lesbian couple traveling on our honeymoon in Turks (like we did in parts of the Middle East or Africa where we've traveled). Knowing the general undertone of homophobia throughout much of the Caribbean, we also didn't expect a bottle of champagne waiting for us when we arrived at our villa or a note of congratulations, and we didn't get one. According to, "Turks and Caicos may not exactly be completely gay friendly, but it isn't not-gay-friendly either," which pretty much sums up our experience. We didn't feel unsafe, but we also weren't recognized or celebrated as I imagine any straight couple on their honeymoon might be.

We rented a villa on Chalk Sound away from the main tourist area, which provided complete privacy and a serene setting (not to mention a private pool, BBQ and beach with a kayak). We were able to retreat back to our secluded space each day and act as gay as we wanted without a care in the world (and gay we were).

The only moment of true annoyance on our week-long honeymoon was an encounter with an overly effervescent couple from Oregon, who rambled on and on about how they were visiting on their honeymoon, and didn't ask a single question about us or why we might be there, let alone think for a minute we might also be celebrating our new nuptials. We just secretly giggled when they returned on the ferry with us later that day, a mosquito-bitten, miserable sweaty mess and watched as newlywed husband and wife sat on opposite sides of the boat from one another with scowls on their faces the whole ride back.

I'll take a silent, happy gay honeymoon over a loud, straight and miserable one any day.

In hindsight, I'm not sure we could have had a better honeymoon and I wouldn't have changed a thing. I've yet to find that perfect place as beautiful and pristine as an island chain like Turks, and as gay-friendly as P-Town. Now that would be a match made in gay honeymoon heaven.

Check out the below images from our honeymoon and share your thoughts on good destinations for gay honeymooning.

My Big Fat Gay Honeymoon