McCain Sends Biden to Key Swing States

"I told Joe, I will pay your plane fare, hotels, all your expenses," Sen. McCain said. "Just get out there and say whatever's on your mind, my friend."
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In a move unprecedented in the annals of presidential politics, Republican presidential nominee John McCain announced today that he was sending Democratic vice presidential nominee Joseph Biden on a campaign trip to several key swing states.

"I told Joe, I will pay your plane fare, hotels, all your expenses," Sen. McCain said. "Just get out there and say whatever's on your mind, my friend."

Sen. McCain added one small caveat: "Whatever you do, don't edit yourself."

The Arizona's senator's unusual proposal is part of what one aide called the campaign's "Two Joes" strategy.

"For the next two weeks, this campaign is going to be all about two Joes," said McCain spokesman Tucker Bounds. "Joe the Plumber and Joe the Blabber."

But the McCain campaign's plans were short-lived as Sen. Barack Obama today announced plans of his own for talkative running mate: "Between now and the election, Joe Biden will be reaching out to voters in Antarctica and possibly the Moon."

Sen. Biden said he was grateful for the assignment, adding, "I will be proud to serve under Barack Obama, especially when one of our enemies tries to test him with a full-on nuclear attack. Kerblooey!!!!"

Andy Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com.

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