Sunday Roundup

This week, America, on its journey down the path toward a more perfect union, continued its prolonged pit-stop at Chick-fil-A. The meal consisted of an overheated "appreciation day" for the fast-food chain, cooked up by Mike Huckabee, and a bitter side order of attacking fat people. No one ever said civil rights wouldn't come with an occasional bout of national indigestion. In India, over 670 million people were thrown into darkness during the biggest blackout since Charlie Sheen's last drinking binge. On Wall Street, a rogue algorithm caused a trading spree that wreaked havoc and gave America's stock markets yet another black eye. Meanwhile, Olympic fever momentarily broke with news that eight badminton players had been disqualified for intentionally losing their matches. All across America, sports fans reacted with disbelief, amazed that badminton is actually an Olympic sport. Lastly, we mourned the passing of a legendary writer and provocateur. RIP Gore Vidal.