Que Sera, Siri?

How far is distant gratification? Get me to its nearest exit, Siri, and let it be your parting gift. The quest for instant gratification in communication is eroding all mystery and chance from human equation. And creating concave personalities, stripped of all subtlety and coyness yet bloated with nano-pedestrian infos. We've become our own cable outlets, saddled with dead bytes to fill and endless slow Facebook days -- Let's hear it (moderately and infrequently) for distant gratification. That sweaty, inconvenient beast that makes us seduce, craft, pine and work for our preys and prizes. Teens are dropping FB as, it turns out, it instantly reopened Calatrava-like bridges to their same bloods, its their sacrosanct hormonal right to want to burn. Mating is virtually pursuit- and divination-free as the Blendr and Grindr of the globe place only ripe, vetted prospects in front of humans. And if one gets lost near, say Golden Meadow, La. and wants to check out that Hooters tee-loving Adonis that once breezed through a Weather Channel update, GPS will martially re-rout us to our destination, if not our destiny. Less "Quo Siri?" and more "Que Sera?" (the Miley version), please! Let adventure resume reigns. There are ways to polish that ventral prefrontal cortex (part of the brain responsible for impulse-control). The so-called slow-media movements have taken their name to task, as their latest notable "springs" seem to date circa 2010. But there's hope in repudiating excess techno-assist without seeming passe, as it seems to be a move increasingly embraced by some cool specimens. Like my friend Theo, who's been called stone-cold hottie and violently hip and is the custodian of Adidas Y-3 and SLVR communication for the Americas. She has recently decided to put her personal communication in the hands of an Ettore Sottsass Letter 22 baby blue typewriter. I'd like to give the resurrected (Western Union apparently killed it circa 2006) telegram a try at American telegram. It's probably less lethal and more intriguing than impulse texting. Heavensfield (home of the reSTART Recovery Program for problematic technology use) can wait.