05/09/2014 02:43 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

The Real Mothers of Mother's Day


It is so easy to say the words, 'Happy Mother's Day' and be done with that.
It is almost as if we forget about The Real Mothers of Mother's Day. So today we will remember them and honor them.

Today I think about all the mothers who were born to have children but never have.

I call this loss invisible.

As the world forgets that these amazing women have to endure endless years of grief. That they are mothers to all the unborn children they dreamed of and thought about every day for years.

Today I also think about the daughters and sons who believed that their mother would be with them longer than she was. I call this loss premature. As they still need their mom to guide them. The daughters and sons had to grow faster and learn to live without the person who was here to love them unconditionally.

And unconditional love is our birth right.

Today I think of all the step mothers who have stepped in to love and care for children they did not birth, but yet love as if they did.

And all the step mothers who find it hard to be a mother to a child they share with someone else, with another woman, the ex wife of their husband.

They keep on trying, hoping and doing the best they can.

Nobody talks about those mothers and nobody sees them as true warriors as they have a battle in their own home every day. This loss is also invisible as nobody truly knows how it is to mother a child who does not want you.

Today I hold your hand if you are a grandmother that had to mother her own grandchildren because your daughter passed on or left on her own. I call this loss unnatural.

Today I hold your hand if you are a mother who can no longer see, touch or hold your child in your arms. I walk with you. In silence. I walk with you in respect. And I find a way to travel the depths of sorrow you have to live with every single day. Especially on Mother's Day.

Today I think of you if your children have left you behind in a nursery home, in another town or city, far away. Angry at you for whatever reason. Know that you will always be their mother, their real mother.

Today I think of you if you are a single mother. A mother who has to learn to be the father who is no longer here. I think of you every day and every night when you wrestle with your young kids trying to be all that you can be. I bow at your feet.

For me, all of the above mothers are The Real Mothers of Mother's Day, they are the heroes that walk amongst us. Celebrate them with me this weekend. And make them feel special as they need those flowers more than anyone else.