Dear Father who art in Heaven, in Earth, in all things, Blessed be Thy Holy and Righteous Name, All around me the world as I have known it, is collapsing. Our dreams to make another difference in this world are in danger of becoming just another foolish person's whimsical thoughts.
Here I am Lord, my soul is lifted up to the foot of Your throne. I can't look upon You Father. I am not worthy. But I can cry out to You, as a child who is suffering severe pain, pleading for Grace, not on my behalf, but for those who by my demise will suffer the greatest.
You have always made a way. In the deepest, darkest hour, You have always come through. I praise You for that. I praise You for Hope, for second chances, for third, forth and fifth chances; for new opportunities to fix my past mistakes. I praise You for Your never ending love, for continuing to forgive. I thank You, too, for my much undeserved health, when so many, much more worthy than I, are hurting. I praise You for the promises of rescue and for being with me today.
I'm scared Father. I have not the answers to all those who seek, and rightly so, to know when our circumstances will change. I have prayed continuously for the past three years for help; to be in Your Divine presence and receive direction to insure my plans are Your plans. This project, this path, has been my life. I have no job to speak of, except to survive; because the world as I knew it, came crashing to the ground in 2008.
I beg You please for mercy. Unmerited favor Lord is what I seek, not for who I am, nor for what I have done, but for who You are. I've screwed up. The economy hasn't helped. All my life I have managed to lead, to work, to succeed, but always with Your help. I still can, but not alone. Never have I done anything alone. You lead, I follow and we succeed. I lead, I stumble, I fall. Thankfully, You have always been there to pick up the pieces, brush me off and allow me once again to move forward with You.
However, today Father, I feel abandoned, as though You have left the room in the middle of my ever evolving crisis. It's as though You have turned a deaf ear to my continuous cry for help. Each day that passes, the deeper and darker the abyss becomes. Where Father are You? Can't You see I'm dying here, from the inside out; right before Your eyes? Come quickly please, I beg You.
Over and over again, King David cried out to You for rescue. I guess he too found himself continually in a world of hurt and despair, time after time. He was a man, according to the scriptures, made after Your own heart. When his world came crashing in, You rescued him; You saved and restored him. You lifted him from the muck and the mire. You set his feet on a rock on which he could stand firm. He repeatedly climbed from the valleys to the mountain tops, all the while, shouting Your praises to the heavens; because of Your mercy, because of Your Grace, because of Your rescue. I want that too!
I know in my heart, my mind and my soul that You have always come through for me. Scary as it may be to me, it's always been on Your time, not mine. So this I plead, give me unrivaled patience as I wait patiently on You; for You to be glorified through me and my unworthiness. Please keep the alligators at bay, the tigers corralled and the sharks in deep water until Your mercies flow and rescue me.
I have been continually blessed throughout my life beyond measure; for that I praise You, for that I thank You. I have had the privilege to see You at work in this world, at work in the lives of others; and at work, continually in and in spite of me.
I have been honored to accept Your Son, Jesus, as Savior and Lord. My humble soul kneels in awe because of this most precious gift, given through Your most amazing grace. You are my Father and I, am Your child. What a privilege, what an honor.
Please Father come quickly. Bring forth the light to remove this darkness. Reveal to the world the answers they seek through me; that You and You alone may be Glorified. Your mercies are new every morning and each days dawn brings forth opportunities to honor You in all we do.
Thank You Father for letting me vent. I just needed to share this prayer with You today. Most of all, thank You in advance, for turning Our Disaster's into Destiny.