THE BLOG
01/09/2017 05:49 pm ET Updated Jan 10, 2018

3 Simple & Effective Ways to Make Your Marriage More Loving

2017-01-09-1483993672-67312-moveloving.jpg

The holidays are over. The New Year is here and with it comes new hopes and dreams.

Whether you make New Year’s Resolutions or not, now is a good time to improve your life – and your marriage/relationship.

3 Simple & Effective Ways to Make Your Marriage More Loving

Following are 3 simple & effective ways to stop fighting & increase romance and happiness in your relationship in the New Year.

1. Look in the Mirror - because all change begins with you!

If you want your partner to be more loving, then you need to be more loving. If you want your partner to be more forgiving, then you need to be more forgiving. If you want your partner to be more patient, then act more patiently towards him/her.

In other words, demonstrate the behavior you want your partner to show you.

If you want your marriage to change for the better – improve your own behavior towards your partner.

Remember, all change does, in fact, begin with you!

2. Ask for what you want & need. Your partner is not a mind reader. If you want or need something from them – tell them.

It’s amazing how many times people tell me they shouldn't have to ask their partner for what they want and/or need from them – their partner should just somehow magically know.

When I ask these same people if their partner will give them what they want if they ask for it – many of them immediately say yes!

SO what the heck?!?!? Then ASK!!

Refusing to ask for what you want and need from your partner almost guarantees you won’t get it (not always, but usually).

Not getting what you need will leave you feeling empty, unfulfilled and eventually angry. Over time, this anger will turn into resentment.

And resentment is the kiss of death for any relationship.

It’s your responsibility to speak up and ask for what you want and/or need from your partner!

Your partner doesn’t have a crystal ball!

3. Forgive, Let Go & Move On! Holding onto slights and hurts will only damage your relationship.

Any one in a long-term intimate relationship can attest to the value & absolute necessity of forgiving, letting go of anger & moving on when your partner hurts you.

As long as your partner is truly sorry for having wronged (or hurt) you - it is essential you move on!

Don't just give lip service to moving forward; truly and sincerely let it go!

As mentioned in tip #2, holding onto anger over time creates resentment. Resentment is the key ingredient that destroys intimacy and happiness in any relationship.

IF you’ve been hurt by your partner (and who hasn't?) as long as your partner is sincerely sorry for the pain they caused, you must forgive, move on and just let it go!

Letting go of slights is the only way to let your love grow!

Conclusion

As hard as we might try, we cannot really change anyone but ourselves.

Loving thoughts and behaviors towards your partner will promote loving thoughts and behaviors from your partner.

Changing yourself and how you treat and react to your partner will directly impact how your partner treats and reacts to you!

#911MarriageHelp #MarriageExpert #CommunicationExpert

To learn more about Dr. Patty Ann visit:

911marriagehelp.com
www.drpattyann.com
twitter: @drpattyann
facebook.com/strongrelationships