After Every Scandal There Come the Welcoming Arms of Showbiz. Here are some new movies, shows, and remakes for Tiger Woods to Consider.
Elayne Boosler's new movie: "The Blisterhood of the Unraveling Pants". His mistress' new group movie, "The Dis-terhood of the Cavilling Rants".
Joel West's new buddy movie: "Brotherhood of the Simpering Lance". Or "Motherhood of the Shriveling Glance."
Mike Spicer "The First Wife's Club."
Joel West "Fight Club," or "First Wives' Fight Club"
Lorrie Irby Jackson "Waiting to Impale."
Carmen Gallo Colley "Lost Toy Story."
Victor Del Mar He was named "The Associated Press Athlete of the Decade". OF COURSE!
Elayne Boosler Well, you have to be associated, and you have to press.
Joel West Driving Tiger, Beaten Wagon
Lorrie Irby Jackson "What's (Golfing) Clubs Got To Do With It?"
C. Todd Mccormick "The Whore's Whisperer."
Lorrie Irby Jackson "Humping Tiger, Hidden Floozies."
Elayne Boosler "Nights in Road, and...the..."
Glitch Gillis "Star Whores."
Elayne Boosler "So You Think You Can Cheat?"
Dave McConnell "Atonement."
Suze Allen Brown "Four (under par) Weddings and a Funeral".
Thomas Crosbie "Tiger's Eleven." "Tiger's Twelve." "Tiger's Thirteen."
Victor Del Mar No longer pursuing Jack Nicklaus career wins, he's going after Wilt Chamberlain's scoring record!
Elayne Boosler So, "The Day of the Jackal."
Suze Allen Brown "Inwhorius Basterds."
Elayne Boosler " A Serious Manwhore." "Julie and Julia and Tiger."
Glitch Gillis "I Know How You Are and I Saw Who You Did." "Das Booty." "Days of the Condom.""I Love You Alice B. Toklas (But So Does Tiger Woods!)"
Suze Allen Brown The Fantastic F(whore!)
Beth Cohen Levine "Meet the F*ckers"
Lorrie Irby Jackson "Horndog Sings the Blues"
Glitch Gillis Famous movie quote: "I just can't quit you. And you. And you. And you . . . ."
Steve Bonser "Teed Off at the Ball Washers."
Thomas Crosbie "Driving Miss Easy."
Lorrie Irby Jackson "Two (X's two x's two x's two) Can Play That Game."
Victor Del Mar "A Tigers Tail Part 12."
Lorrie Irby Jackson "Hitch....Then Switch. And Switch. And Switch."
Tom Sumner "Cave the Tiger." "Lie of the Tiger." "Paper Tiger."
Elayne Boosler "Golfzillas!"
Thomas Crosbie "Six degrees of Fornication."
Victor Del Mar "The F*ck it List." "Ho's on the Range."
Glitch Gillis "The Wizard of Faux-Pas."
Lorrie Irby Jackson Soundtrack's hit single, "Blame It On The Bootie."
Elayne Boosler "Blame It On the Bootie Nova".
Victor Del Mar "12 angry (Wo)men."
Elayne Boosler "The Real Housewives of Somewhere Else Imaginary."
Glitch Gillis "The Scorn Birdies." Or tv show, "The Orifice."
Victor Del Mar TV comedy classic "Different Strokes"
C. Todd Mccormick "Lawrence of A Labia."
Glitch Gillis "Slurpico." "Ho-jack."
Elayne Boosler "Laverne and Shirley and Elin and Vicki and Uchtang and Donna and...."
C. Todd Mccormick "Puss in Boots, Flats, Heels, Clogs, Sandals, Espadrilles and Flippers."
Glitch Gillis "Not White and the Seven Whores."
Boris Boden "Goodbye Mr. Chip Shot".
Suze Allen Brown "Stye of the Tiger."
Elayne Boosler "The Lord of the Tees; The Return of the Ring." "The Passion of the Titelist."
Glitch Gillis "Most Encounters of the Bird-Kind," "Tiger Does Dallas. And Chicago. And Berlin. And Tokyo . . ."
Boris Boden "Raging Bullsh*t".
Elayne Boosler "Ice Age, the Meltdown."" Happy Feet Not So Much."
Boris Boden "The Elin Degeneration Show".
Boris Boden "To Elin Back".
Pamela Ann Bernard "Free Willy."
Suze Allen Brown "Lying King"
Elayne Boosler "I Was Legend." "The Dark Night." "Madasagascar: Escape to Sweden." "Quantum of Notice." "Chronicles of Too Far-nia, Prince Has been."
C. Todd Mccormick "An Inconvenient Ruth."
Beth Cohen Levine "Whorey Gilmore."
Victor Del Mar "Dr. RangeLove."
Glitch Gillis "In the Tally of Elin."
C. Todd Mccormick "Horton Hears a Ho."
Victor Del Mar "My Fairway Ladies."
Elayne Boosler "The Oddfather." "Demons and Demons." "Night at the Museum-Alibi."
Victor Del Mar "Withering Heights."
Ken Volok "Around the World in 80 Women."
C. Todd Mccormick "Bawl About the Benjamins," "The Legend of Shagger Vance."
Ken Volok " A Stud is Born." "Dog Lay Afternoon." "Ambien Crackers."
Victor Del Mar "Into the WOODS", "Mates of Wrath"," And Then There Were..WHAT? ANOTHER ONE?!"
Glitch Gillis "Ambien of Coral Gables," "Lays Miserable."
Ken Volok "All That Ambien Allows." "The Pig Sleep."
Victor Del Mar "Stroker Ace", "Burned after Reading", "I Know Who You Did Last Summer."
Bob Leonard "I'm Dreaming of a White Mistress."
Victor Del Mar "Hole"s, "Swingers", "Iron Man", "Down and Out in Windermere Florida."
Elayne Boosler "Behind the Green Jacket."