Monks meditate before dawn. Yogis advocate reading spiritual books upon awakening. Experts suggest journaling before breakfast. But like many moms with young children—and me when my own kids were young—Lindsay McCarthy instead awoke to her young daughter lifting her eyelids, then entered the sprint to get the kids out the door. She did have her own spiritual practice, but it was inconsistent and usually done late in the day.
Then Lindsay and her husband heard life coach Hal Elrod speak about his recommended morning practices, and she realized the key was to include her children in the various steps, rather than futilely try to cram it in before they arose. Their attempts were so successful they published a book last year called The Miracle Morning for Parents & Families. I love the idea of having the kids join in your spiritual routines, so I spoke to Lindsay recently about how she does it. Here is an edited excerpt:
Meryl: Why is it important to do spiritual practices in the morning?
Lindsay: The main reason is that studies have shown we have the most control over our time in the morning. If we don’t do these practices then, chances are they won’t happen. It’s also a great way to start the day. If I’m just bombarded with my kids’ needs from the minute I roll out of bed, I’m going to be grumpy, and that’s not good for any of us.
Meryl: You’ve adopted Hal Elrod’s “Life SAVERS” approach from his own Miracle Morning bestseller to set up the structure: Silence, Affirmations, Visualization, Exercise, Reading, and Scribing.
Lindsay: Yes, although when the kids joined in my son said, ‘Why do I have to save my life?’ and I realized that concept might not connect with kids, so we also changed some of the words and sometimes call it CHARMS.
Meryl: So let’s go through how you do the SAVERS with kids. First is silence.
Lindsay: When we do silence with the kids, it’s usually some sort of motion, like a walking meditation. Or we combine it with the visualization and do a guided mindfulness exercise. The free meditation app Insight Timer has wonderful guided meditations for kids that are also great for adults.
Meryl: And then you have a few minutes for affirmations.
Lindsay: We created our own “ABC Affirmation Book” out of paper. Each day for 26 days we wrote the next letter in the alphabet and the kids picked words to go with the letter, such as amazing and awesome for A. Now we read them out loud each day. Alternatively, we might listen to songs with positive lyrics, which are great because the words get stuck in your head the rest of the day.
Meryl: Then you do visualizations?
Lindsay: Although there’s an order to “Life SAVERS” so you remember the steps, you can do the practices in any order. We often combine visualization with silence when we do a guided meditation. Or I’ll visualize myself as a tree with roots down into the earth to ground me, or with light coming from above my head to feel elevated.
Meryl: You talk about exercising for about 10 minutes. Is that enough?
Lindsay: It’s enough to wake up your body, which is why you’re doing it in the morning. Later in the day you can do a longer exercise for other health benefits. In our house, we keep the morning exercise really playful. (Actually, we try to be playful throughout the day, because it’s great for bonding with kids, and because a playful mindset is best for coming up with creative solutions to any problems we’re facing.) We might have a dance party to music in our kitchen, or play Simon Says or another game.
Meryl: The last two items are reading and scribing (or journaling). How do you do that with kids?
Lindsay: I like to read something spiritual and short by myself; for example the one-page daily guides in Science of Mind magazine. Then we read aloud as a family. Some of my favorites with young children are the books Oh, The Places You’ll Go! by Dr. Seuss, Sean Covey’s 7 Habits of Happy Kids, and Cookies: Bite-size Life Lessons by Amy Cross Rosenthal—books we parents get something out of as much as our kids do. For scribing, I always recommend starting with gratitude, such as writing three things you’re grateful for. Kids who are too young to write—or to dictate to you—can draw a picture of what they appreciate.
Meryl: What I like about your program is you’re switching from thing to thing so it doesn’t get boring. Yet it doesn’t take an exorbitant amount of time.
Lindsay: Right. We talk about a 60-minute Miracle Morning but you don't even have to spend that if you’re pressed for time. You can do it in as little as 6 minutes, one minute for each activity—although if you’re doing it with your kids, they probably won’t let you stop that quickly.
Learn more about Lindsay McCarthy and her book The Miracle Morning For Parents and Families at her website https://www.gratefulparent.com/
Meryl Davids Landau is the author of the new book Enlightened Parenting: A Mom Reflects on Living Spiritually With Kids. Her previous book is the novel Downward Dog, Upward Fog. She’s also been published in numerous women’s magazines, including O: The Oprah Magazine, Parents, Glamour, Redbook, and more.
Watch Meryl’s 2 minute YouTube slideshow, “5 Tips for Being a More Enlightened Parent”