Bing Crosby to sing at Trump's Inaugural

President-elect Trump’s senior adviser Kellyanne Conway announced today that the Bing Crosby Estate has granted permission for the broadcast of Mr. Crosby’s famous recording of God Bless America at the Inaugural ceremony on January 20th.

“Mr. Crosby was the best-selling recording artist of the 20th century, having sold over one billion records,” Conway stated. “So we are proud and happy to have him participate in the Inaugural ceremony. The President-elect couldn’t be more pleased. He’s determined to make American music great again.”

The recording of God Bless America to be played at the Inaugural was made in 1940. Bing Crosby died in 1977. So Conway’s announcement has the unfortunate effect of underscoring the Inaugural Committee’s difficulty in booking artists who are still living.

So far those declining invitations to perform include Céline Dion, Elton John, John Legend, Gene Simmons, Garth Brooks, Andrea Bocelli, Kiss, Bruno Mars, Justin Timberlake, Bart Simpson, and Lassie. At this point, the only confirmed talent are 16-year-old America’s Got Talent 2010 runner-up Jackie Evancho, the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, and three dancers from the Radio City Rockettes who happen to be “personal friends” of Mr. Trump’s.

Ms. Conway also announced that she’s negotiating with the estate of the late Ethel Merman for the rights to broadcast Merman’s iconic recording of Anything Goes at the Inaugural. “We’re determined to include Anything Goes in the program,” she said. “It’s the President-elect’s favorite song.”

Not fake news, but authentic satire.

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