I promise that if Obama loses I will give him 5 tips next week, so I am slightly hedging my bets on this one! Although this article isn't only for John McCain it is for anyone worth their salt who knows how devastating it can be to invest your heart and soul in to a very ambitious project, only to find that with all the time, effort and even money you might have spent, you fall short. Whether it is a business that fails, a relationship that doesn't work or a race that you run. I always say that it's not the obstacles you face in life, as obstacles are part of the human experience. It's how you go over, under or through them that is the true test of your mettle!
So here are my tips for John Mc Cain and to those of you who have fallen short of a desired goal and live to tell the tale.
Tip 1. Don't blame yourself or think that things might have been different if you had done 'this' or 'that'. Circumstances were as they were, and what has passed has passed. Take the lessons from the experience and move on. In McCain's circumstances he has had a formidable opponent, and with the state that the country is in under Bush, it would be very hard for him to win regardless of what he did.
Tip 2. Always get 'in to bed' with someone you know and trust. This person is going to be a partner for a long time. Like a marriage, they are someone who you will have to make decisions with, who will be by your side and you will have to take in to account at every moment. In McCain's circumstances he chose a partner who he didn't know. He has been involved in Government affairs for many years and in that time he must know at least one person really well, who he trusts would have made an extremely compelling and complementary running mate. But instead he and his adviser's chose someone they didn't know. A more intelligent and non-reactive choice would have worked in his favor.
Tip 3. Keep taking risks. What would you prefer, to live a mediocre life without risking at all, or to look back on your life and know that you have had the guts to go for a goal, regardless of whether you achieve it or not? There are many people who are commentators of life, who judge the risk takers, as it's so much safer than going for it and participating themselves. But to play the game of life means to risk. If you risk nothing, you get nothing. As for McCain, he has had and continues to have an amazing career. He has gone beyond what most people could ever achieve and he should look back and be extremely proud of himself.
Tip 4. Don't take it personally. Look at what worked and what didn't work and why it didn't work. What did you learn about yourself and what would you do differently next time? (If there is a next time.)
Tip 5. Sometimes when you don't achieve what you want, your life turns out even better than you could ever have dreamed possible. Look at how Al Gore's life turned out for example. For McCain, after a while of licking his wounds he might want to look at all the benefits of not being president right now. This is going to be an extra ordinarily tough job. It is like jumping on board a ship that has to be bailed out of water. He could chose to be grateful that at 73 he doesn't have that sort of responsibility and can have the next number of years to really enjoy his life with new doors opening, more time with his family and perhaps again like Al Gore, he can chose to make a difference in another way and leave a different and equally valuable legacy.
That's it for this week if you want to get hold of me please e-mail me at sophie@howhappyis.com.