We are bombarded from all media channels with tips, tricks, tools and pieces of advice that tell us what we should be doing to be successful, rich, healthy, and happy. You would think that by now, most people would be successful, rich, healthy and happy.
So why don't we feel that way?
How come we know the answers to the most asked questions and we do not get the outcomes that they promise? Is there a problem with the information? Is there a problem with us?
You see, most people start with the premise:
"This does not work, because I am not smart enough, I am not thin enough, I am not experienced enough, I am not in the right city, at the right time..."
They set themselves to failure before even beginning.
I hear my clients say all the time:
"I could be successful, but...
...I am not ambitious enough
...I cannot wake up early
...I do not have so much time
...I need to take care of my family
...I need to study more
How many of these ring a bell? What other things do you tell yourself? What are your excuses for not being successful YET?
This whole topic kept me awake for many nights, because not only I wanted my clients to be more successful, but I also wanted myself to be more successful.
And then it hit me "How do I measure success?"
This is where it gets interesting.
I personally used to measure success in how much money I made. But how much money COMPARED to who?
Compared to my mentors. I did not care about people "like me" because these are not successful yet, I cared about THOSE people: the 8 figure entrepreneurs, the movie stars, the Olympians - those were successful examples.
With this kind of thinking, it is only normal to be intimidated by how much time and effort it would have to take to finally feel the feeling of accomplishment, the feeling of being successful.
And then I turned the other page.
"How does my life look like to others from an underdeveloped country? Do they see me as being successful compared to what they have and who they are?"
How come some people can look up to you, admire and envy what you have, when you feel like you are not THERE yet?
Instead of waiting, hustling and beating yourself up, you can feel successful RIGHT NOW by measuring it in a different way.
1. IT'S NOT ABOUT WHAT OTHERS HAVE OR DO.
We are all different, unique beings and comparing your worth and value to someone else is like you compare a pear to an orange. Yes, they are both fruits. Yes, they are both delicious. One might be more expensive than the other, but does that make it better? Does that make it more delicious? Isn't it about personal preference?
When you want to measure your success, stop looking at everyone around you. It's not about them, it's about you. Look at your past, are you the same person? Do you make the same amount of money? Do you have the same relationships? If you can see an increase in ANY area of your life, that means that you are successful.
2. IT'S ALL ABOUT JOY!
Do you experience joy on a daily basis? What makes you experience joy? It can be a sunrise, a smile, a new client, working on your business, cooking for your loved ones, going out, exercising, meditating and many others. Joy is a great compass to measure success. If you feel joy, it means you experience success. Period.
3. IT'S NOT A DESTINATION, IT'S A JOURNEY!
I am sure you have heard this before and it never had more sense than when I heard Abrahams Hicks explain it at a workshop. Our purpose on this planet is to experience things, not to tick off to do's. Somewhere along the way, people started rewarding the end of a process to motivate themselves.
Their intention was good, but in a faced paced life, this can get easily misleading and so we started looking only at the end instead of the whole journey. Success is every little step that you take towards your goals.
Using these measuring tools, are you successful?
If you are and I am sure you are, can you do me a favour?
Look in the mirror and tell yourself "This is what a successful person looks like!"
Got another way to measure success that was not mentioned here? Share it in the comments below - I'd love to hear it.
Roswitha Moti is a life and career coach at WellFitsYou.com where she teaches women to be happy, healthy, wealthy and fulfilled. She also runs Estilo Tendances - a fashion, beauty & lifestyle blog. She believes in a positive world and that we can all contribute to it with our own unique gifts. In order to get to know them, start the 28 Day Challenge to self-discovery here!"
Follow Roswitha Moti on Twitter: www.twitter.com/WellFitsYou