A friend of mine, Jana Stanfield, has a beautiful voice. One of my favorite songs is "If I Were Brave." Listening to the song again made me think about a very useful exercise!
Fears hold us back in so many ways. Remember, most of us are living lives of habits and patterns ruled unconsciously by fear. It's time to WAKE UP to our fears and begin to live our lives from a conscious basis of love and understanding -- not an unconscious basis of fear!
So... here goes. Here is the exercise. Find a piece of paper and write at the top, "What would I do if I was not afraid?"
Write down all the areas in your life in which you are experiencing challenges that you would like to change or in which you would like something to be different.
Answer the following questions for every issue, whether it is at home, work, family, around friends, in the community, at school, or any other area I have left out.
· Can you identify the fears that are contributing to your issues?
· What would you do here if you were not afraid or didn't have these fears?
· How would you behave?
· In what ways would your behavior be different from what it is now?
· How would your world look in the new fear-free scenario?
· How would others behave around you?
· How would you feel?
· What would you hear and see? How would you move?
Try this exercise with your children -- it would be one of the greatest gifts you can give them. Helping them become aware of their fears and addressing them early can change their lives!
Make these questions a regular exercise: Each month, go through the same routine. But... you must make the environment safe so the children can be honest. You are there to help them see how fear holds them back and is unnecessary in most cases.
If you become angry with them for speaking their truth, rather than trying to understand them and asking what makes them feel fear -- or if you ridicule or mock them -- the fears will be heightened and more destructive... and validated in their minds.
One of the most destructive and prevalent fears that underpins many of our destructive or other-than-positive behavior patterns is the fear that we are not worth loving, which brings me to part two of the exercise! Now, do the same thing answering this question: "If I really believed I was worth loving, I would..."
If there is someone in your life whom you really trust and feel safe with, ask them to help you and go through the exercise together. It may change your life!
Shine the light on your fears and watch them evaporate.
Someone recently sent me a YouTube clip of Anita Moorjani, and I am including it here for you to see how her near-death experience outlined how fear dominated her life... and how dying and coming back to life showed her that we ARE love and are meant to see ourselves as magnificent beings of love totally worthy of being loved! Fear skews our true vision and makes it our vision of the truth.
Live your life fearlessly: Do the things you would do if you were not afraid. But be sensible -- there are some things where timing is important or safety must be considered!
To live in fear of being diagnosed with cancer or any other illness causes you to focus on that and bring it toward you, as Anita discovered.
To fear what others think allows them to rule your life.
To fear being your true self jams up all flow in your life.
Go ahead: Do the exercises. If you are afraid of the answers, it's even more important you do it!
Comments? Thoughts? Inspiration that might help others? Feel free to share your ideas in the comments below!
Zooties and thanks for reading!
Amanda Gore
For more by Amanda Gore, click here.
For more on becoming fearless, click here.