Five months ago Andy Samberg and the men behind him (Lonely Island) released a video called "Jizz in My Pants" that took the Web by storm. It chronicles some missed attempts at sex by sketchy guys that end up jizzing in their pants before they can seal the deal.
Well, the Pantless Knights, a group of guys who make comedy videos, decided to shoot a ladies' response to it when they were approached by the company Ms. Taken--which sells fake engagement rings to women who want to ward off creepy guys. They made the following video to promote the product, and it turned out to be pretty darn funny. We especially appreciate the Tom Cruise reference.
You can download the free mp3 here and read the lyrics below!
UPDATE: We have just been informed that the video below has the same concept as another parody of "Jizz in My Pants" released back in February by Lindsay Gareth & Kosha Patel that was a hit on Funny or Die. The original has the same chorus and the same two-woman set up, but isn't as funny as the one below. Still, it was first and deserves that acknowledgment. Thanks to blogger Juliet Jeske and commenter Joetheartist for bringing this to our attention!
UPDATE NUMBER TWO: We have just heard from one of the Pantless Knights who says they didn't know about the other video when they came up with this idea and we're inclined to believe them. It's impossible to be aware of all the videos being released on youtube and FOD at any given time and the Web makes purposeful plagiarism a ridiculous pursuit. But, as our own Juliet Jeske says on her blog, "There is...parallel thinking, like having jokes that are about the same topic that are coming from the same perspective. But the same song lyrics? That gets a little too specific for me to think that there wasn’t some 'inspiration' going on here." Here's the message from Peter Furia:
"We came up with this original idea on our own on January 1st, 2009, and wrote all the lyrics later that month. We also had our shooting script locked before "the other one" came out. We have a crap load of emails and word documents to prove it (were we to ever need to). The bottom line is that it's every content producer's worst nightmare to find out someone else had your same idea and released their video/film before you (especially after we worked so hard on it for 4 months straight). We wish only the best for the other video's producers and would love for them to know the truth as well."
WATCH:
Douchebags all across the club
Ladies' night straight poppin' the bub
Stalker eyes right above his drink
Cheese-dick style, with a shoot and wink
Snatch the ring from its hiding place
Flip the bird right in your face
Leave the bar, to escape your glance
Cross the room, now its time to dance
You sneak behind, don't mind, I guess
Until your dongs on my cocktail dress
Cold as ice, yet you advance
And say you might, jizz in your pants
and I PUKE IN MY MOUTH
Swallow it back, I need some room
Plus I said Ive got a groom
I turn away, you start to pout
AND I PUKE IN MY MOUTH
You ruined my night, esophagus hurts,
Take a hint, Im not here to flirt
Round up the girls, its time bounce
Now I'll go brush my teeth
I'm 15 late for my Yoga class
Kick through the door, now I'm up in that ass
Find a spot, last in the room
Focus, breathe, now its time to ohhhhmmmm
Thats when I noticed this guy behind me
Quite a big smell from a guy so tiny
Pit-stained T-shirt drenched in sweat
O-face grin, bad as it gets
He made a grunt, then his body turned
Saw up his shorts to his inner-thigh perm
AND I PUKED IN MY MOUTH
Upside-down, so it's even worse
Son of Shiva, what a curly curse
Help me please, I could use a towel cause I
PUKED IN MY MOUTH
Why are there dudes up in Yoga class?
Nonchalant, looking at my chest
Please stop staring when I'm on my knees
Plus bearded men shouldn't wear capris
Last week, I was on a site
As I recall, it was a Facebook site
In my bed with a piece of toast
Checked my wall and saw your post and I
PUKE IN MY MOUTH
Soaking in the tub like a f***ing queen
Need to relax, need to feel the steam
A bubble comes up that reminds me of you and I
PUKE IN MY MOUTH
The next day, I put on jeans and PUKED IN MY MOUTH
I opened the fridge and a fruit rolled out, I PUKED IN MY MOUTH
When I saw Tom Cruise in Valkyrie I PUKED IN MY MOUTH
I drank a Kombucha and I PUKED IN MY MOUTH
I just felt PUKE IN MY MOUTH
I puke right in my mouth, every time you're next to me
And when you spit your game, it's like a train wreck to me
You're such a royal douche, I don't know why you step to me
Forget a rubber, you should go get a vasectomy
PUKE IN MY MOUTH...