Male politicians have never been celebrated for their fidelity to their wives or their general propriety with women. Thomas Jefferson was a founding father in more ways than one.
He may have possessed the most dazzling intellect of any of his peers, and his writings
form a cornerstone of America's ideals about itself. There is little doubt, though, that he
also abused his position and had children with at least one of his female slaves.
Married male politicians in the post-WWII era have, if anything, behaved worse. JFK and LBJ were serial philanderers. Their sexual escapades entertained the press who kept these news stories from their readers. This silence held because the press were overwhelmingly male
and because, rightly or wrongly, extra-marital affairs were considered out of bounds and/or irrelevant to the larger issues on which these politicians had staked their careers. Martin Luther King, for example, might never have succeeded in becoming a leader of the Civil
Rights movement if his nemesis, J. Edgar Hoover, had succeeded in coercing newspapers to publish leaks about King's less-than-faithful behavior as a husband. François Mitterrand
had a second family. The French press knew his private life would be a scandal and
kept it secret.
American politicians in the last 25 years have not been so lucky. Gary Hart left the 1988 Democratic presidential race after he boldly dared reporters to catch him cheating, and
they promptly did. Bill Clinton's first election for the presidency in 1992 signaled a new attitude by the press. A candidate's sexual history now was held up to the public for inspection and judgment.
Sexual transgressions, however, are not created equal. Some are more egregious and pardonable than others. The circumstances differ along with the impact zone of the revelations.
Take this quiz and judge for yourself how you rank each politician on the Creep-o-Meter. Give each of the 5 criteria ("criminality of sexual act," "gross hypocrisy," etc.) a score of 1-5 (with 5 being the most heinous).
Total the score and the politician with the highest sum qualifies as the Stupidest Dick.
1. Bill Clinton
__Criminality of sexual act
__Gross hypocrisy of behavior
__Extenuating circumstances (i.e. marriage already in trouble, equality in statute and power of
sexual partners, willingness to admit guilt)
__Damage to political reputation
__Permanent scars inflicted on wife and family
2. Newt Gingrich
__Criminality of sexual act
__Gross hypocrisy of behavior
__Extenuating circumstances (i.e. marriage already in trouble, equality in statute and power of
sexual partners, willingness to admit guilt)
__Damage to political reputation
__Permanent scars inflicted on wife and family
3. John Edwards
__Criminality of sexual act
__Gross hypocrisy of behavior
__Extenuating circumstances (i.e. marriage already in trouble, equality in statute and power of
sexual partners, willingness to admit guilt)
__Damage to political reputation
__Permanent scars inflicted on wife and family
4. Eliot Spitzer
__Criminality of sexual act
__Gross hypocrisy of behavior
__Extenuating circumstances (i.e. marriage already in trouble, equality in statute and power of
sexual partners, willingess to admit guilt)
__Damage to political reputation
__Permanent scars inflicted on wife and family
5. Dominique Strauss-Kahn*
__Criminality of sexual act
__Gross hypocrisy of behavior
__Extenuating circumstances (i.e. marriage already in trouble, equality in statute and power of
sexual partners, willingess to admit guilt)
__Damage to political reputation
__Permanent scars inflicted on wife and family
6. Arnold Schwarzenegger
__Criminality of sexual act
__Gross hypocrisy of behavior
__Extenuating circumstances (i.e. marriage already in trouble, equality in statute and power of
sexual partners, willingess to admit guilt)
__Damage to political reputation
__Permanent scars inflicted on wife and family
*Yes, I know he has not been convicted of any crime and is innocent until proven otherwise. Score him according to a "hypothetical" guilty verdict. Even if sex was consensual,
as the defense may want to claim, then DSK is still a creep of the Bill Clinton variety.