Well isn’t this ironic: The love stories we read and watch are screwing up our actual love lives.
In a new video from the The School of Life, acclaimed philosopher Alain de Botton explains how romantic novels and films warp our expectations about love and relationships. More often than not, the plots focus on how the protagonists fall in love rather than how they sustain their love.
“A wiser kind of love story would know that the real problem isn’t finding a partner, it’s tolerating them and being tolerated over time,” he explains. “It should appreciate that the start of relationships is not the high point that romantic culture assumes; it’s merely the first step of a far longer, more ambivalent yet quietly far more heroic journey.”
Watch the clip for more of de Botton’s take on the damage romantic films and books do to real couples.