The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant -- but succinct -- wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week's great tweets from women, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for our past collections.
"I'm going to wake up early and go for a run before work tomorrow" — liars
— Ella Cerón (@ellaceron) February 22, 2016
Guys who make "daddy issues" jokes TOTALLY have great relationships with their fathers too.
— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) February 24, 2016
is there a rule that requires trolls to have the American flag and/or bald eagle somewhere on their Twitter profile?
— Franchesca Ramsey (@chescaleigh) February 25, 2016
Who is the Beyonce for dudes? Batman?
— Ariana Lenarsky (@aardvarsk) February 20, 2016
ME: I don't see myself in anyone on GIRLS
— Jazmine Hughes (@jazzedloon) February 22, 2016
LENA DUNHAM: *makes Marnie a horrible crazypants control freak during her wedding*
ME: thanks!!!!!
Frankly my dude, I don't give a damn
— Steph Jenkins (@slhjenkins) February 22, 2016
pretty sure that eating a sandwich in your draws under an electric blanket is the closest you can get to heaven without dying
— Tracy Clayton (@brokeymcpoverty) February 26, 2016
when are we getting the Nicki remix of Work @God
— Hannah Giorgis (@ethiopienne) February 25, 2016
"I know, I'll make the final stages of PMS almost exactly like the early stages of pregnancy! For maximum monthly anxiety!" - God, probably
— Chloe Angyal (@ChloeAngyal) February 21, 2016
Carry yourself with the confidence of Marco Rubio giving a victory speech for something he did not in fact win
— Heben Nigatu (@heavenrants) February 21, 2016
*random dude tries to talk to me on the street*
— amber ♡ (@missambear) February 21, 2016
Me: unsubscribe me!!!!!!!
[1789, woman opens beautifully wrapped hand delivered message] Oh my...yet another gentleman caller has sent me his penis portrait...
— bougie beth (@bourgeoisalien) February 22, 2016
you either understand Damn Daniel or you lived through the Clinton administration
— Marisa Kabas (@MarisaKabas) February 22, 2016
Most peoples' relationship history can be summed up well by a song from a musical
— Mara Wilson (@MaraWritesStuff) February 24, 2016
Unfortunately mine is from Sweeney Todd
Miles beneath the ocean, an island comprised entirely of discarded wasabi from takeout sushi inches ever closer to the surface
— Erin Gloria Ryan (@morninggloria) February 25, 2016
The second i turn 21 I'm transforming into wine mom
— Kira Craft (@kiracrafty) February 24, 2016
Electing Donald Trump to fix America is like having a baby to fix your marriage.
— Twitnter Is Coming (@OhNoSheTwitnt) February 24, 2016
Patriarchy means women get paid less for the same work and also they have to read the time off MUCH smaller wrist watches.
— Nadia (@NadiaKamil) February 26, 2016
we need to stop trusting people who voluntarily wake up before 10am we need to stop trusting people who voluntarily wake up before 10am we n
— buckle bunny (@accessforbidden) February 21, 2016
Look out weekend- I just got a whole new box of emotions in the mail
— Shalyah Evans (@ShalyahEvans) February 26, 2016
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