The Freedom Tray: Protecting Food And Drinks From Tyranny (VIDEO)

The Freedom Tray: Protecting Food And Drinks From Tyranny (VIDEO)

I'm an American. And like most Americans, I like my food and drinks to be organized, secure, and most of all, free from tyranny. I can't tell you how many times I've spilled soda in my car because the Taliban have been impeding my freedom.

Okay, maybe that's not true. But if this advertisement for the "Freedom Tray" is any indication, Americans are being held down in their need to easily transport food and drinks. Whether it's because they lack freedom or, in this case, are too lazy to get out of the seat, the "Freedom Tray" is their answer.

So rest easy my friends, the Freedom Tray is here. And we're all better Americans because of it. Well, not the blond woman in the infomercial. She seems to have a slight foreign accent and probably wants to steal my freedom tray. Not today, Blondie. Not today.

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