The Top 10 Funniest Tweets From Middle-Aged Americans This Week

I made it into middle age without getting flabby upper arms, I probably should have had loftier life goals

— m'IGH'qul (@lyric_intent) October 11, 2016

Happy birthday @JoyVBehar! I know turning 40 isn’t easy but don’t worry things get better as you get older. https://t.co/UjgTWbpFG3

— Bernie Sanders (@BernieSanders) October 7, 2016

Don't worry ladies, I really am a drunken, middle aged, balding, married retiree.

You are not being cat fished.

— jeffswarens (@jeffswarens) October 11, 2016

Middle age is when you recognize the classic rock songs that have been turned into elevator music. #showerthoughts

— Emma Nicholls (@BeansandBells) October 13, 2016

My body is like an old car when getting older Almost every time I sneeze,cough or sputter, either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires!

— ..... (@DesyMckee) October 8, 2016

At my age of 74, I've been in many locker rooms but I've never heard, once, the kind of things Trump said!

— Oldigby (@OldIgby) October 10, 2016

At my age, instead of an accident free day counters for job sites, I need a day counter for days I sneeze without leaking some pee

— Anna Nonymous (@osoplain) October 7, 2016

I'm a woman of a certain age, I guess. Mainly because I'm so old now, even I can't seem to be certain of my exact age when asked.

— ✨WendyDarling✨ (@wendchymes) October 8, 2016

Advisory: My previous tweet will only be appreciated by folks of a certain age. Apologies to those of you w/full heads of luxuriant hair.

— Gerry Brooks (@GerryBrooks) October 5, 2016

Someday, I'm going to be able to tell my grandkids that I was a proud member of the global conspiracy that kept Trump from being president.

— Claude Taylor (@TrueFactsStated) October 14, 2016