This isn't another doom and gloom "Poor you, here's how to survive the humiliation of being single this holiday season" article.
The truth is, while being with the right someone enhances all of your life's experiences, there is no shortage of joy and upside to be had while you're single. And the holidays are no exception!
The joy and celebration of the holiday season is not only for couples, no matter what When Harry Met Sally taught you. Now is the time to put on your armor of self-love and let other people's expectations and opinions regarding your relationship status bounce right off you.
This holiday season, I urge you to focus on being grateful for what you do have, not lamenting what you don't. What you focus on expands, so be sure to focus on joy!
Here are the top 3 reasons to be grateful for being single this holiday season!
1. Your Obligations Are Your Own
Chances are, there is something you're not too thrilled about doing this holiday season that you feel obligated to do. It could be that three hour drive to your cousin's ugly sweater party or your annual office party that usually ends in drunken disaster.
The good news is: whatever obligations you have are your own. No worrying about your obligations plus someone else's. You don't have to do something you really don't want to do and you don't have to compromise and go along with your significant other's holiday traditions and obligations.
You can start your own holiday traditions. You can decide to host a New Year's Eve pancake dinner if you want to. If you're serious about finding a loving relationship and you take proactive steps to make that happen, you'll find it eventually. For now, enjoy that you don't have to endure someone else's nightmare office party or dysfunctional family gathering. That might not be the case forever, so enjoy it while you can!
2. You Get the Fresh Start That You Want
The reality of being in a committed partnership is, you can't make big life changing decisions without taking your partner into account (unless you're just really selfish, which I know you're not, right?). If 2015 is the year you decide to finally take a month off and go to Peru to learn Spanish, guess what? You can do that! If you decide to throw out all of the junk food in your house, make and keep a strict budget or finally get that puppy, you can do that, too!
I'm not suggesting that being in a committed relationship means you have to give up on your hopes and dreams. At least, not in the right relationship! But if your partner doesn't want the responsibility of a puppy, won't give up keeping a gallon of mint chocolate chip ice cream in the freezer at all times, or feels that impulse shopping is what makes life interesting, it's going to be more of a challenge for you to make the changes you want.
A great New Year's resolution idea is to be more positive, loving and living your life more passionately. Not only would you probably feel better about yourself, you'd also be getting yourself in the perfect mindset to meet someone who is in alignment with that energy. And you don't have to worry about your new intentions and mindset potentially clashing with that of your partner.
3. There Are More Opportunities to Expand Your Social Circle
There is much fun to be had during the holidays. Of course, there's the mistletoe (no commitment required!), but more than that -- you have lots of opportunities to take advantage of the most social season of the year, with your friends, loved ones and the new friends you meet!
Decide that you're going to head to parties and holiday events with the intention of enjoying yourself and connecting with someone new, non-romantically. That doesn't mean you're not open to meeting your next boyfriend or girlfriend (and your chances of meeting him or her will be greater if you're enjoying your life), but it does mean that's not the only thing you're looking for.
By choosing to meet people with zero agenda but having more good people in your life, you will experience more joy. It's easy to find good and interesting people to talk to when your only criteria is that they are a good and interesting person!
The added benefit of making new friends? You never know who you might meet who could eventually connect you with your next love. Expanding your social circle is a critical factor in jumpstarting your dating life! That's why we matchmakers will talk to anyone and everyone. Everybody knows someone you don't know, and that new friend's best friend might be the perfect match for a client, or a perfect match for you!
Now get out there and have some fun! Happy Holidays!
Find me on Twitter @DearFranny and let me know how your holiday season is going!