“You need to check out the massage offerings at the spa,” she said with a smile as we sipped champagne at the check-in desk of Desire Riviera Maya near Cancun. We listened to the hostess give an overview of the resort, including clothing-optional sunbathing, ocean-side cabanas, poolside activities, theme restaurants and nightly adult entertainment. “Outdoor sex is limited to the rooftop Jacuzzi lounge,” she said without batting an eye.
And that was it. We were about to cross the threshold into a Not-Safe-For-Work Adult Disneyland.
It was a gorgeous afternoon, so we promptly deposited our clothes in our room and headed to the pool. As we arrived, “Play Maker” staff members Kate and Bernie were standing on a surf board in the middle of the pool, explaining a game where couples would hop on the board and demonstrate as many sex positions as they could in thirty seconds. It was surprisingly hilarious and my husband and I jumped in to try it ourselves. We put in a “respectable” showing, and the laughs were a fun ice breaker.
Next, we decided to check out the rooftop Jacuzzi. As we sat at the bar there, chatting with other couples, my husband pointed out the couple steaming up the glass shower next to the Jacuzzi. I was more fascinated by the woman who was on a mission to give as many men as possible a blow job, marveling how clear it was that this was for her pleasure, not theirs.
I remarked to the couple we were chatting with about the stark contrast between how taboo these things are in the “outside” world and how normal they seemed here. Anything seemed possible. It made me wonder, if I could curate what I wanted this weekend, what would it be? Was there a fantasy that had previously only lived in my mind that I could make happen right here in real life?
At that moment, I remembered the hostess’s comment to check out the massage offerings, so decided to head to the spa to learn more. The receptionist’s English was limited, so he pulled out a flipbook that described each massage. They all seemed pretty standard: Stones, Essential Oil, Perfect Back, Reflexology, Erotic Ritual. Wait, what is Erotic Ritual? The description read:
An exclusive ritual, specifically designed for our guests, where you will indulge in a world full of magical and erotic sensations. This provocative massage will awake that intimate desire between you and your partner in a universe of warm and pleasurable emotions.
Huh? What exactly does that mean? I asked the host. He responded “In that one… they touch,” he paused, “the erogenous zones.”
I’m pretty sure I know what that means, I think to myself, unable to hold back a smile. In truth, it was the answer I was hoping to hear. “When in Rome…” I thought as I booked a couple’s session. The host asked me if I wanted a male or female masseuse. “Male,” I responded, wondering if it was really possible to create in real life what I imagined during my last deep tissue massage back home in California.
We showed up the next day for our appointment. They gave us robes and told us to meet in our private Jacuzzi room where they would have champagne waiting for us. I went to the women’s locker room to change into my robe.
While pondering the need for separate women and men’s locker rooms at a nude resort, a woman changing back into her clothes asked me what massage I was getting. “Erotic,” I responded. At which point she actually squealed “Oh my god… me too… I came… eight times!”
I ran to the Jacuzzi to tell my husband what I had just heard. I was a whirlwind of nervousness and excitement, and leapt out of the hot tub the moment they knocked on the door to let us know that it was time for our massage. As we walked down the hallway, my husband and I held hands and grinned stupidly at each other.
We entered a room just like any other spa complete with massage tables, soft lighting, instrumental music, essential oils and lotion. Our masseuses gestured for us to lie down on our respective tables, about ten feet away from each other, and draped us with a thin sheet. My masseuse gently pushed my feet apart in order to spread my legs under the sheet. My pulse jumped and my smile got bigger.
This was definitely not going to be an ordinary massage.
As I took a few deep breaths and settled in, I realized the sheet was slowly being pulled down my body, inch by exquisite inch. I never knew a bedsheet could caress a person until I felt it work its way down my back, between my legs and eventually off my feet until I lay naked on the table. Then came the oil. Slow, warm drips down my arms and legs and up my back. As an anticipation junkie, I was in heaven!
As I mentioned, I am no stranger to massages back home. I love the relaxation I feel when I’m getting touch, and am grateful for the opportunity a massage provides to help me pay closer attention to my body. The start of this massage felt quite similar in that respect.
But as this massage progressed, I noticed relaxation turning into a sweet tension as I heard my husband moan on the other side of the room. I guess he was having a good time as well. As my masseuse’s kneading worked its way up my inner thigh, I decided to let out a moan as well. This dropped me into my body further and created a positive feedback look between my husband and myself.
Towards the end of the massage, the masseuse guided me over to my husband’s table to lay with him. We practically floated out of the spa afterwards and convinced nearly everyone at the resort that they should head to the spa as soon as humanly possible.
Since returning from Cancun, I noticed the risks I took that weekend were an important step on my journey of challenging what society tells me is “normal” in sex and relationships. I learned that trying new things and noticing my body’s response is a great way for me to feel out what is “normal” and bonding in my relationship, not to mention, turn fantasy into reality.
New to this blog and want to start at the beginning? Check out this post about why I started a blog about sex.
You can also check out these resources or email me at pam@downtothere.com if you are interested in classes or coaching to explore your own sexuality. I am a sex and relationship coach and if I can’t personally help you, I’d be very happy to connect you with other wonderful sex educators, coaches and therapists.