Moms, Can We Please Give Each Other a Break?

The whole media storm over Sheryl Sandberg's book makes me wonder, why are we so set on judging each other? I know one thing from my personal experience, if you are a mom, you're working hard. None of us are better than the other.
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NEW YORK, NY - DECEMBER 02: Sheryl Sandberg, Facebook's chief operating officer, speaks on December 2, 2011 in New York City. Facebook will be opening a center for engineers in New York City in 2012. Facebook, the world's largest social networking company, is expected to file for an IPO in April, and a public offering could reach a valuation of up to $100 billion and raise $10 billion. (Photo by Spencer Platt/Getty Images)
NEW YORK, NY - DECEMBER 02: Sheryl Sandberg, Facebook's chief operating officer, speaks on December 2, 2011 in New York City. Facebook will be opening a center for engineers in New York City in 2012. Facebook, the world's largest social networking company, is expected to file for an IPO in April, and a public offering could reach a valuation of up to $100 billion and raise $10 billion. (Photo by Spencer Platt/Getty Images)

I think you are all awesome (dads are fabulous too, but that's for another blog). I have never met a mother who did not express her love for her children in the most beautiful way. Working or not. Religious or not. Affectionate or not. Struggling or not. Leaning in or out. Young, old, French, Chinese, American, African, Asian, we're all doing an amazing job.

The whole media storm over Sheryl Sandberg's book makes me wonder, why are we so set on judging each other? I know one thing from my personal experience, if you are a mom, you're working hard. None of us are better than the other. Our choices don't make us better or worse than another mom, they just make us different.

The commitment to be a mother is awe-inspiring to me. It makes me look at other mothers with pride and camaraderie. Why do we need to be mothers in the same way? Why can't we all make choices that are best for our families?

Maybe we can put down this constant judgement and adopt an attitude of curiosity. Instead of assuming what is best for each family, let us be open to the choices we all make. Let us support each other.

Parenting is the most challenging and gratifying roles of our lives. If your parenting style and work schedule works for you and your family, then I say bravo to you. Would you please extend the same courtesy to me?

As mothers, our love for our children never changes. The expression of that love changes with time and with circumstances. Instead of approaching each other from a place of judgement, insecurity and guilt, why don't we approach each other with love and support.

Let us not assume that a choice, any choice, invalidates our priority to be the best mothers we can. My mother who has adult children and teenage grandchildren, still considers herself a "full-time mom." During her life, she has worked no-time, part-time and full-time. At no time did I think that my brother and I were not her top priority. My own daughters have seen me work hard at building my business, and I hope that I have inspired them to follow their own dreams and inspirations.

I met a mother recently who said to me that she was a "full-time mom" implying that I was not since I work full-time. To that I say, is there a way to be anything but a "full-time" mom? We are all full-time moms, just because we work full-time does not make us part-time moms. We are all full-time moms from the day our babies are born and remain full-time until the end of our days.

To all the moms out there, I know you are trying your best and doing a really great job. Bravo to all of you!

Fauzia Burke is the Founder and President of FSB Associates, a digital publicity and marketing firm specializing in creating awareness for books and authors. For online publicity, book publishing and social media news, follow Fauzia on Twitter: @FauziaBurke. To talk with FSB and ask your book publicity questions, please join us on Facebook.

© 2013 Fauzia Burke. All Rights Reserved.

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