(Warning - this article contains spoilers!)
In Episode 6 we had accelerated ahead six months to Nancy dreamily wandering around Chez Esteban with her big baby belly, looking radiant - if more than a tad vacant. Esteban decided to make an honest woman of her, but his plans were foiled by a screeching spike-heeled Spanish-speaking senora in the final scene of last week's show.
Episode 7 starts with another clever title sequence. In this one, we are looking at the actual Wikipedia page for Weeds, and hearing the vintage theme song for the show in more innocent days (back when Nancy was just a soccer mom / ganja peddler), "Little Boxes." Those were the days, my friends. Nancy's now furiously packing her things as Esteban tries to soothe her and prevent her from leaving. She wants to know who the stiletto-heeled Mexicunt (her word, not mine) was who is preventing their holy matrimony. It turns out that the lady in question is one of the pillars of Mexican society, and Esteban needs her in order to win the next election in his nefarious political scheme. He assures Nancy that they will indeed get married - after the election.
Back at Ye Old Medical Marijuana Shoppe in Ren-Mar, Silas is still attempting to run a respectable business as Doug wanders around the store completely wasted, eating his fifth THC ice cream cone. Deputy C.P. Jones enters the store wearing civilian duds, having recovered from being beaned last week. He's back to his usual cheery self - extorting Doug and Silas for 10K in order for him not to file charges against them for assaulting an officer.
At the Reyes mansion, once Nancy - who is now very close to her due date - sees that the house is being outfitted with a birthing room, and she's pretty much a prisoner, she reaches out to the one person who will always save her - Andy. And of course Andy - still looking like Jack Shephard in his drunken, drug addled state on Lost last year with his scraggly beard - shows up at Esteban's place driving one of his new toys, one of seventeen General Lee cars used in Dukes of Hazzard Season 4. He begrudgingly drives Nancy away from her beautiful prison, and admits he still loves her even though she is poison. (May I point out here that if this show were at all realistic, the back gate would have not been open, and she would not have been left alone for a second to escape). Her plan is to go to see Dr. Alanis Morissette and induce labor, so she can have the baby on U.S. soil with a U.S. birth certificate - on the grid - rather than Esteban's way which is looking very Rosemary's Baby to her.
We find Celia attending a motivational seminar given by the You're Pretty! Cosmetics lady - Raylene - brilliantly played by Jamie Denbo. All fired up by the class, Celia tries her hand at selling cosmetics to her co-workers from the mall, fails, and returns to the Botwin house, dejected. Here she finds Shane, who has been told by his mother to go there after school as part of their escape plan. He begs Celia to tell Nancy she will take care of him so he can stay there. She's not so hot on the idea until he starts giving her a foot massage - and then advises her she's selling the wrong product. She should sell what people really want. Drugs, for instance. You can practically see the lightbulb go off in her head.
At the pot store, this week's 420 Moment comes as the store's customers are all decked in full costume regalia as part of Comic-Con, which is taking place nearby. Dean Hodes comes in to see Silas, who has retained him as counsel to dissolve his business partnership with Doug. They compromise - Doug will keep away as long as he gets a morning bowl every day. As soon as that's decided, the DEA bursts into the store, guns drawn, and orders everyone down on the floor. They've come to arrest Jones for theft, extortion, and falsifying documents. Turns out the quiet, unassuming guy Silas hired to help them in the shop - whom Doug tried to fire earlier that day so he could hire a hot chick he wanted to bang - is an undercover cop. ¡por supuesto!
Esteban and his chief goon come busting into the hospital, druglord style. He bursts into Nancy's room, where she is lying in bed talking to Andy and Shane. Thinking she is still pregnant, he starts to throw her clothes on the bed for her to get ready to leave. At this point, the door opens and a nurse brings in the newborn baby and puts him into Nancy's arms. "He has your eyes," she says. The scene closes on Esteban cradling his tiny son for the first time, gazing in awe at the child, and holding him close. Nothing like an innocent little babe to shut up a scary big time druglord.
What's next for Lady B and her posse? Tune in every Monday night at 10pm to find out on Showtime.