THE BLOG
01/20/2015 11:12 am ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

'Glitter Bomb Your Enemies' Site Bombs

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Isn't glitter awesome? It's so shiny. And fun. And glittery.

It's totally FETCH.

Well, an Australian company (seriously, using company loosely) thought it was awesome enough to create a service where they would glitter bomb your enemies. You know, send an envelope full of glitter so that it goes everywhere when the person opens it.

Personally, it sounds all levels of AH-MAZ-ING to me, but apparently some people don't like that.

Whatever.

And then, when the Internetz learned about it, the site started getting so many orders that the one guy in a Cornholio T-shirt sitting in his mom's basement at a card table with a dim light and some poly mailers, filling them with glitter through his mom's cooking funnel, got all pissed and was like, "EFF THIS! I CAN'T KEEP UP!" and shut that shit RIGHT DOWN.

"Please stop buying this horrible glitter product -- I'm sick of dealing with it. Sincerely, Mat," the 22 year old, cry-baby owner reportedly wrote, presumably through the ugly snotty cry from his mommy's lap.

But that visual is not even the best part. (Close, though.)

The best part comes in the form of the comments on a website when people started learning about this service. Behold the batshit crazy weirdness genius of people on the Internet. (You're welcome.)

Comments from People With Too Much Time  > Glitter Bombs

 

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 (Ahh, the poor offended schmuck who came to a glitter bomb article and expected to have an intelligent, respectful conversation in the comments? *head pat*)

And the best glitter bomb thought ever?

This post originally appeared on Jacqueline's blog, WritRams.com
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Follow Jacqueline Wilson as @WritRams on Twitter and Facebook to discuss glitterized cockroaches and more super important things in the world.