There was never a doubt in my mind that I would go to college. Where I grew up, college seemed to be the next natural step, a step I took for granted. I could have, and should have, chosen to go to the closest state college, which was Rutgers University, but I had this burning desire to work in politics. At 18-years-old I thought I could change the world, and American University; which has one of the best Public Affairs programs in the country, was where I, with my one-track teenage mind, was desperate to go. I knew I couldn't afford to go to a private institution right away, so I opted to live at home for two years and attend my local community college.
I heard about American Universities Public Affairs program during my sophomore year of high school. I was informed by a senior at American that the education came with career-making internships. I genuinely believed that I would move out to Washington D.C., study hard, and the rest of my life would fall into place.
I received my Associates in Political Science in 2005, at which point I had already been accepted by American and filled out my FAFSA forms. I received word in June that I was only eligible for $1,500 in work study a year for financial aid. Apparently, my single mother, a New York City public school teacher, made too much money for me to qualify for more than that. Every little bit of financial assistance helps, but in comparison to the tuition of $19,000 due each semester plus housing, food and any other expenses; I knew that ultimately, that aid wouldn't take me far. Towards the end of June, I began to panic. I had been living at home for two years and working a full-time job, so that I could go to that school; I had to find a way to make it happen.
That's when I met the seductress, Sallie Mae. Sallie Mae, like a loan shark, was friendly and extremely eager to loan me the money I needed for my education; and, like a loan shark, they forgot to mention what would happen to my proverbial legs if I didn't pay up. Instead, Sallie Mae informed me that I could consolidate my various loans upon graduation; however, they did not mention that I couldn't consolidate private loans. I easily allowed the corporate giant to assure me, because I desperately wanted to believe I was making the right decision for my future.
I told my dream school "yes" and accepted the work study in early July. My parents offered to pay room and board, cutting about $10,000 off of my bill, but the cost per year for American at the time was still a little over $38,000. My father co-signed for one Sallie Mae private loan of $30,000 while my mother co-signed for an additional $30,000 loan. My parents warned me about the interest rate and the risk I was taking, and I promptly ignored their concerns because at the time what I wanted for my future was far more important than the inevitable consequences. They allowed me to assure them, the same way Sallie Mae assured me, because they too wanted to believe in the life I intended to make for myself.
I took out one additional private loan of $18,000 to cover the rest of my expenses and continued to skip the fine print. My father's loan had a reasonable interest rate of 3.75%; however, my loan and my mother's loan were both at 9.75%. To top it all off, not all of my credits were accepted from my community college and I had to remain at American an extra semester. Due to this extra semester, I was forced to take out an additional $15,000 with a 9.75% interest rate. Every time I signed that dotted line, I told myself, "I will consolidate once I graduate." I relied on the idea that I could reduce the interest, and would be well on my way to having a high paying salary. I was 20-years-old, full of hope, and extremely naïve.
I didn't look at my loans again until the day I received my degree in December of 2007. The $93,000 my debt had started off at had ballooned to $120,000 and my repayment plan amounted to almost $1,400 a month on a salary that didn't materialize immediately. Due to the economic downturn, I couldn't find a job in my field that was willing to pay more than $30,000 per year. I knew there was no way for me to afford graduate school, so I started working in sales. I suddenly went from being a world-is-my-oyster-graduate to feeling like that oyster shell was closing down on me.
While there are some silver linings to this story, the end of this tale is what a lot of Americans are facing today. My mother saved me by paying off her portion of the loan to reduce it to a reasonable interest rate. I now pay $350 per month for that loan, and have paid off $10,000. Sallie Mae, who did not in fact help me to restructure my interest rate, takes an additional $662 per month to cover the rest. Even though I have managed to pay my loans on time every month, to this day Sallie Mae has refused to consolidate the remaining $33,000 with the 9.75% interest rate.
I'm 26-years -old and I always feel like I am looking down the barrel of a gun. I have had to turn down jobs that were perfectly suited for me, because the bottom dollar was not something I could survive on. I can't travel, I can't buy a new car, I don't know when/if I will ever own my own home, and because I need to work two jobs to make ends meet, I can't volunteer for the causes that made me want to get into politics in the first place. All because of this $120,000 degree I can't afford to use.
Was it worth it to go to my dream school? I can honestly say even with all the wonderful friends I have made and experiences I have been lucky enough to have, that it wasn't. It really wasn't. While I still count my blessings daily, being young, healthy, and having the ability to work hard and pay this debt off over time, I would have preferred to go to a state school and not have these loans over my head.
If I could say one thing about the private American Education system and how it relates to me, it is that it took someone who wanted to change the world and forced them to focus on just surviving in it.