THE BLOG
09/17/2007 07:12 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

If Stars Hire Stylists for their Hair, Make-Up, Jewelry and Gowns, Why Not for Their Words to Spare Us Such Uninspired Drivel?

I'm not worried about Sally Field's Emmy award speech being cut since she should have censored herself after the first rambling "umm." With all the time, money and effort that Hollywood stars spend on finding the right dress, haircut, jewelry and make-up, couldn't they spend a little effort on creating acceptance speeches that are not insipid, stupid and uninspired drivel?

Of all people, Sally Field should have considered this as priority number one. After all, her Oscar speech in 1985 where wide-eyed and delirious, she sputtered, "I can't deny the fact that you like me, right now, you like me!" was so ridiculed that she became comic fodder. A little preparation could have prevented a repeat episode.

It's not as though she doesn't know capable writers to help with a little dialogue. They're obviously the ones who wrote the scripts that earned her an Emmy on "Brothers & Sisters."

Having interviewed many of these stars at CNN, I know that it is not beneath them to have spiked sound bites in their Prada pocketbooks. With a cheerleader's practiced drill, a star is paraded on the talk shows with anecdotes that may seem spontaneous but are in fact given to the show prior to airtime. Are the Emmys, Oscars or Grammys not more important? They certainly have more viewers. It would be in their best interest for their handlers to also craft an amusing or intelligent response at award shows since they will have to open their mouths to either accept an award or explain away their disappointment. And thoughtful prose would give them top billing in subsequent reviews and spare viewers moans and groans.

Perhaps James Spader was particularly prescient when in his last lame Emmy acceptance speech, he said to his brethren, "You have made wonderful choices in shoes and dresses tonight and you all look beautiful." To many, style is enough.

This is not to say that some stars do not sparkle not only in dress but wit.

Helen Mirren was able to charm and delight within the predetermined time limit. It wasn't hard for her. Why was it for the stumbling Sally Field?

George Clooney, Sarah Jessica Parker, Tina Fey and Meryl Streep are other examples who have managed to string together inspired sentences that impress viewers vs. repel them. Why can't more stars follow their lead?

As my friend Tom Shales, the Pulitzer winning TV critic for the Washington Post, said to me when I called to lament, "As much as they need a bodyguard, they also need a brain guard from making them sound ridiculous."