07/08/2013 02:52 pm ET Updated Sep 02, 2013

The Real Moms of Scarsdale

Is Andrea Sanderlin, the enterprising pot producer, a typical Scarsdale mom? The press depicts her five-bedroom Mediterranean home and her Mercedes SUV as if that's all it takes to be a Scarsdale mom. But isn't there more behind the front door? I like to think so.

In fact, Andrea Sanderlin has almost nothing in common with the moms I know here. First; education. I would be hard pressed to find a Scarsdale mom who failed to graduate from high school; apparently Sanderlin dropped out of high school and had a baby at age 18. Most of the bright woman I've met here did far more than succeed at high school, proceeding onto college and earning advanced degrees in the law, business, medicine, and more.

Work: From accounts in the press, Sanderlin never had a real job and certainly not a profession. But speak to the women of Scarsdale. If you don't find them on the train platform commuting to work now, they'll share their histories of impressive careers in banking, publishing, advertising, real estate and more. The women of Scarsdale I know are enterprising. Unlike Sanderlin, they don't work under the radar but in broad daylight and pay taxes on what they legitimately earn.

Community: After Sanderlin's arrest hit the news, I asked many people around town if they knew her. I couldn't find a single person who had made her acquaintance. In fact, I got a call from a CNBC producer who sought information from me because no one knew anything about her. She had not joined the PTA, volunteered at a religious institution, served on the Junior League or led the scouts. Her name was nowhere to be found. When she posted a $500,000 bond for bail, even the backers of the bond did not know her and the judge warned that she needed to add some blood relatives to the names on the list of her supporters.

The Scarsdale moms I know are connected. They attend local meetings, campaign for the school budget, volunteers for worthy causes, produce plays, plant community gardens, organize fundraisers, join, raise their hands, speak out, and in short, care. Not Sanderlin.

What's the message? The right address and a luxury car doesn't make the Scarsdale mom. The reason no one knew her here is because she was not one of us. She was busy growing weeds while we were tending to our families, our jobs and our community. Pat generalizations about people and places are often just that: pat. Pleez....don't insult the real moms of Scarsdale by equating us with Andrea Sanderlin.