07/23/2013 01:14 pm ET Updated Sep 22, 2013

How to Work With a Day of Coordinator

There have been hundreds of articles written on why you should hire a wedding coordinator, and what it is exactly that we do. When it comes down to it, however, the fact is that a full service wedding coordinator is just not in the budget for many couples. Regardless, I think it's fairly safe to say that a day of coordinator is almost always essential. Here are a few tips on how to make the most of working with your day of coordinator.

1. Remember that a good coordinator asks a lot of questions.

I have a feeling that I annoy most of my Day Of Coordination clients at least once during the day of prep process, with all of my emails and endless questions. It's important to remember, however, that you are the one planning the majority of your wedding, and that a good coordinator wants to know exactly what you have figured out. We don't ask questions about water service and lighting because we want you to spend more on these services, but because we know that these are things that can easily slip through the cracks.

It's very important that you answer any questions that your coordinator asks, even if you don't think it's necessary or you don't care. If you don't care, then say so! It's better to know that something is a low priority, than wonder if it was just forgotten. Remember that your coordinator is a resource for you; if you don't have something figured out, they should be available to help you figure it out.

2. Understand their responsibilities.

When signing a contract with a wedding coordinator, be sure to thoroughly go over all of the services that they include. Every wedding coordinator is different, and you may be surprised at what some coordinators do and do not offer. For example, I offer the supervision of the set up and break down of the reception, but I am not able to physically set up any furniture or put out place settings. I do, however, put out any personal items, such as escort cards and champagne flutes. When clients delegate these tasks to their wedding party, or expect my staff to set up furniture, there is always confusion. Don't be afraid to ask your coordinator to clarify what their responsibilities and expectations are, so that everything runs smoothly on your wedding day.

3. Trust is essential.

One of main reasons I hear for not having a wedding coordinator is not cost, but autonomy. They want to be able to make the decisions and do the planning. While this may be one of the biggest misconceptions about wedding coordinators in general, it is absolutely essential to trust your wedding coordinator, at least on the day of your wedding.

When making the decision on whom to hire, ask yourself if they are the type of person that you can trust. Will you be able to let it all go on your wedding day, and trust that they will get it done? If you do not trust your coordinator, your experience is not going to be great. If you do let go, and trust that they will get it figured out, I guarantee that all you will remember about your wedding day is seeing your husband or wife for the first time, and partying with your guests. Even if you think you are a wedding expert at the end of your planning, you don't want to play expert on your wedding day. I promise.