Grab a four-pack of wine coolers, guys, it's time for a college a capella show!
The trailer for "Pitch Perfect," starring sneaky child Broadway star Anna Kendrick, would-be "John Tucker" murderess Brittany Snow and "Bridesmaids" scene-stealer Rebel Wilson, dropped recently and dang did it drop it like it was hot. The movie follows an all-female a capella group at the fictional Barden University (a thinly veiled LSU) on its quest for glory and soaring notes, all the way to an eventual showdown with a rival all-male group -- full of hot and mysteriously attractive jerks, of course.
Having grown up in a college town with a group of drama-nerd high school friends embarrassingly devoted to a certain all-male a capella group, you can count me so, so, so in for the film's October release. I mean, I've spent too many nights sitting on a blanket on the quad while sipping clandestine mixed drinks out of Gatorade bottles and listening to good-looking guys reinterpret pop songs entirely with their mouths to not be logging into Fandango.
That said, there was one disappointing thing about the trailer (other than the weird flight attendant costumes Kendrick's group sports): Really? Only one cheesy music pun? (The film's tagline is "Get Pitch Slapped.") So many music terms that can be twisted for immature giggles! So many missed opportunities!
Since October is an awfully long way away, and I'm not talented enough to arrange a little a capella ditty of my own to pass the time, here are nine of my favorite dumb music puns.
1. "Hold me...I'm a fermata."
2. Aural fixation.
3. "You're sharp."
4. CLEFTOMANIACS!
5. Funkbuddies.
6. When Kendrick's girl group finally performs their big number, I get the feeling they're gonna ROCKAPELLA THE HOUSEEEEE.
7. "We're gonna get in a lot of treble."
8. Please, please, please can we refer to these ladies as sexy pitches and acafellas, just once, just for me?
9. And if you'd really like to get dirrty, C. Aguilera style, the soulful tunes of singing, dancing, gyrating, beatboxing, swoon-inducing men may be referred to as c--kapella.