What are your goals for the new year? Do you want to get slimmer, healthier and sexier, or reach new levels of career success?
No matter what dream you're pursuing, here's my advice: start by getting happier.
Why? Because negative energy drags you down. It drains you and makes you old. And it makes you say I can't, when you really can.
Unload your negative baggage, and you'll feel stronger and younger. You'll even look younger. And you won't just be healthier -- you'll be better at everything you do.
Success starts with positive energy. So if you want to reach your goals in 2015, cultivate the following three mindset-altering habits. They're the most powerful ways I know to turn resolutions into reality.
1. Say, "Next..."
Life hurts. In fact, it sometimes hurts a lot. And it's really easy to get stuck in that pain. But if you do this, you're letting your pain define you. We all know people who are trapped in victimhood -- and they're unhealthy, unhappy, and unsuccessful.
So if you suffer a betrayal, a disappointment, or a failure, don't get stuck in your pain. Here's my secret: There is a way to dismantle that pain quickly.
This is the way to do it. First, face the pain, process it, and get angry about it. Then, literally say in your mind... next.
If someone's words wound you, say next.... If you take a financial hit, say next.... Even if someone breaks your heart, say next...
Picture the word. Replace the pain with something that brings you joy. It can be your kids, your friends, even your pets. Find something that floods your body with joy. This will bathe your body in "feel-good" hormones and change your mental state instantly.
Now, do this. Every day, allow yourself to think for ten minutes, and ten minutes only, about your pain. Do this at the same time each day. Set a timer. When it goes off, you are done. Say next.....
Don't get stuck in your pain. Keep moving forward, and you'll be amazed at what happens next.
2. Live in your truth.
How often do you lie every day? And before you answer, think hard.
Did you tell your Facebook friends today that your kids are doing great -- even though Johnny just told you, "I hate my life?" Did you tweet that you're planning a romantic night, when you're secretly scared that your partner is losing interest in you? Did you tell everyone "I'm doing fine," when you're actually lonely and scared?
If so, you're going through life wearing a mask... and there's a high price for that. Living with secrets makes you unhappy, and it can even make you sick.
So if you're spending hours each day putting on a false front at work or around your friends and family, resolve to live in your truth this year. Instead of faking it, tell people honestly: "I'm scared," or "I'm unhappy," or "I screwed up."
When you do this, you'll stop draining your mental, spiritual, and physical energy simply to prop up a lie. And magically, when you stop pretending to be perfect, you'll feel happier and healthier.
In addition, something else amazing will happen: Your friends will start telling you the truth. As a result, they'll be happier and healthier, too. It's contagious... in a very good way.
3. Say, "So What?"
We all care about what others think. But if you're doing this to the point that you deny your own ideas or beliefs, you're making yourself unhappy. And worse, you're denying the real you.
Worrying constantly about what other people think lowers your self-esteem and stifles your creativity. When you're totally focused on fitting in and making a good impression, you never discover who you're really meant to be and what you're really meant to do.
So if you want to be happy and successful, be the person you are -- not the person you think other people want you to be. Don't be afraid to say, I disagree. Don't hesitate to say, I'm different. And don't think being popular is more important than being you.
As model and author Tyra Banks puts it: "Never dull your shine for somebody else."
Renumbering Your List
Developing a strong and peaceful mindset is the first step in aiming for your goals -- especially if those goals are big ones. So if you wrote out a list of New Year's resolutions, here's what I want you to do. Go back to your list, and add these three new resolutions at the top:
• Say "Next..."
• Live in My Truth
• Say, "So What?"
Start with these three, and I promise you -- all the rest will follow.