04/29/2014 05:37 pm ET Updated Jun 29, 2014

Are Men More Controlling?

I'm not sure. Are you? Women have long been unfairly labeled as bitches when demonstrating firm leadership skills while men are described as strong. This often relates directly to control.

I can cite numerous times in the workplace where both men and women have gotten so controlling, so out of hand, that they undermine the morale of their team and the success of the very project their managing. You can too, right?

Being controlling is a good thing. But being too controlling (too anything?) is rarely a good thing. As I say in my book, you're probably accused of this more than you like and more than is warranted. Thing is, taking control is essential to your company's growth and success.

The other thing is, some take it too far. Where do you draw the line? Deciding how much control to take isn't always easy. Just how far to go with people and situations depends on the circumstances.

Consider whether any of these describe you:

You micromanage.

You lack trust in others.

You think you're the most capable.

You refuse to let go.

You impose your will too much and too often.

If none of these are you, have you seen these traits in others? If they do describe you, you might want to consider how much more goodwill and good work you could be creating.

They say you can never be too thin or too rich. But the instinct to seize as much control as possible is definitely too much of a good thing, like overexposure to the sun or relying too much on one club or nail color. There's a time and place to control, such that you'll otherwise jam the mechanism, a surefire way to bleed your team, your organization, and your career.

Maybe it's a gender thing. Maybe it isn't. But either way, in the workplace and out, it's a behavior to be aware of and to manage in yourself and others.

What do you think?