THE BLOG
08/22/2007 01:48 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

Fall Movie Preview

After a summer of threequels, CGI storytelling, family fare/torture porn it's time to move into the season of human drama, complex themes, and character studies -- in other words, Oscar hopefuls. Here's a preview of some of the fare you'll be subjected to this Fall. This should give you some idea of what to see or miss. I summarize so that you don't have to:

THE KINGDOM -- Jaimie Foxx in a high-voltage political thriller set in Saudi Arabia. It cost $70 million, the same as STARDUST. But instead of cute unicorns frolicking they gun down jihadists.

RUN, FATBOY, RUN -- A guy who's not really fat enters a marathon. Does he even really run? Title should be WALK FAST, BEER BELLY, WALK FAST.

LEATHERHEADS -- George Clooney stars, co-writes, and directs this romantic comedy about pro football in the 20s. Should hold football fans until Michael Vicks stars in LONGEST YARD 2.

3:10 TO YUMA -- Either a western or the American Eagle flight you don't want to be on.

THE JANE AUSTEN BOOK CLUB -- Jane Austen movies are becoming their own genre. Next summer expect Mike Myers to star in JANE AUSTEN POWERS.

KING OF CALIFORNIA -- Michael Douglas as a crazy person who believes there's gold buried under the local Costco. Shovels are on aisle 23 and jackhammers are on aisle 16.

IN THE SHADOW OF THE MOON -- Documentary on the men who walked on the moon. Interviews with Buzz Aldrin before his recent face lift. Oh how he misses those days of zero gravity!

LUST, CAUTION -- I worry about any film with "Caution" right there in the title. Ang Lee returns after BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN with more standard fare: A Chinese language WWII espionage love story set in Shanghai. Starring Joan Chen, not to be confused with Julie Chen who hosts Big Brother.

SYDNEY WHITE -- Amanda Bynes in a college fairy tale. Features Dopey, Cokey, Roofy, Cheney, Bong, Animal, and Ryan Seacrest.

ELIZABETH: THE GOLDEN AGE -- Sequel to ELIZABETH. She's back and this time she's pissed!!

VIRGIN TERRITORY -- A romantic comedy set during the Black Plague. I hope they don't just go for the easy laughs.

LOVE IN THE TIME OF CHOLERA -- Sounds like the same subject matter as VIRGIN TERRITORY.

ENCHANTED -- Clever idea. A Disney animated princess comes to life. Starring Amy Adams. She finds it hard to live in a world where people flee at the sound of Alan Menken songs.

SAW IV -- This time Jigsaw takes a job as a Benihana chef.

STEPHEN KING'S THE MIST -- People face the sheer terror of their glasses fogging up.

LOOKING FOR CHEYENNE -- A film about French Lesbians. Opens November 16. I've already got my ticket.

CASSANDRA'S DREAM -- Woody Allen's 38th film. Hopefully his 15th good one.

SWEENEY TODD -- Tim Burton adapts Stephen Sondheim's masterpiece. With Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter (duh), Alan Richman, and Sacha Baron Cohen. My question: Can Helena Bonham Carter (Burton's girlfriend) sing? Or even bake?

YOUTH WITHOUT YOUTH -- Francis Ford Coppola directs his first movie in ten years. Financed by his winery. There was going to be a big car chase scene but the 2005 Zinfandel crop was disappointing.

ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS -- Why???

THE DARJEELING LIMITED -- The title says it all.

MICHAEL CLAYTON -- George Clooney in a complex legal drama. If it sells four tickets expect a TV version with Ron Livingstone.

DAN IN REAL LIFE -- Steve Carell in a triangle love story involving his brother. Stay for the closing credits where he apologizes for EVAN ALMIGHTY.

LAKE OF FIRE -- Director Tony Kaye's 17 year examination of abortion. Good luck to the marketing department.

I'M NOT THERE -- A Bob Dylan biopic but with a twist. Several different people portray him, including Heath Ledger (okay), Christian Bale (okay I guess), Cate Blanchett (a bit of a stretch), and Richard Gere (WHAT??!).

LARS AND THE REAL GIRL -- Ryan Gosling falls in love with a wheelchair-bound plastic "girlfriend". Tara Reid as the plastic doll. But only after seven callbacks

TRADE -- Human sex trafficking in Mexico City. Fortunately not directed by the Farrelly Brothers.

WALK HARD -- Another Judd Apatow comedy, this one starring John C. Reilly as a six-decade rock star. FORREST GUMP meets VIVA LAS VEGAS. The only movie I'd see before this is the one about the French Lesbians.

You can read more from Ken at kenlevine.blogspot.com.