03/29/2010 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

Forget the iPad. How About the iPuke? The iPrank? Etc....

We've gotten used to the iPod and the iPhone; now here comes the iPad. In the coming years I assume we can look forward to a host of other magic gadgets, solving problems with alliterative names:

The iPop
Pops corn while you watch movies. Also tells you to come home by 11 or you can't have the car.

The iPit Removes pits from fruit, so that you can eat healthfully and text at the same time.

The iPitt
Simulates hunky Hollywood dudes of choice, including Brad Pitt and George Clooney (would have been called the iClooney, but didn't have the same alliterative zing).

The iPoke Gets people's attention when they're too involved with their other gadgets.

The iPox Vaccinates you against all poxs, flus, and fevers, including denge.

The iPuke Rehabilitates bulemics.

The iPoop
Helps you evacuate in perfect form.

The iPeep Lets you look into people's bedrooms. Also incubates chicks.

The iPat Gives encouragement when you're feeling down.

The iPlay
Cures workaholics.

The iPrank
Plays practical jokes on your friends and co-workers.

The iProd Gets couch potatoes up and running.

The iPsyche Listens to your emotional problems and helps you embrace them.

The iPrep Cuts veggies and helps you get into Ivy League schools

The iPot
Allows you to cook veggies (see above), while procuring illegal substances.

The iPet
Waits for you at the door with slippers.

The iPutt Helps with your golf game.

The iPep Takes the place of Red Bull and other energy drinks.

The iPlop See iPoop above.

The iPrez
Makes our president keep his promises.