Save Us From Canada!

Scott Walker has boldly gone where no GOP candidate has gone before. He wants to wall us off from the true international menace we've been ignoring for years: Canada.
08/30/2015 09:09 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

Scott Walker has boldly gone where no GOP candidate has gone before.

He wants to wall us off from the true international menace we've been ignoring for years: Canada.

He thinks building a wall along the 5,000+ mile border we have with Canada is an idea worth considering. Finally!

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He is a certified visionary. Because while Sarah Palin claimed she could see Russia from wherever, she forgot Canada was sneaking up behind her--and she never even knew it!

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But score one for Walker. He knows what the real danger is and where it's coming from: Canada and a limitless supply of actors.

Think about it. They've been stealing American jobs for years without anyone paying any attention to their sneaky ways: Keanu Reeves, Neve Campbell, Kiefer Sutherland, Stana Katic, Dan Akroyd, Pamela Anderson, William Shatner, Ellen Page, Seth Rogen, Anna Paquin, Michael J. Fox, Rachel McAdams, Ryan Gosling, and Ryan Reynolds -- the list goes painfully on.

That bold and beautiful much-needed wall would end our national shame and make America truly safe and great again! Scott Wall-ker is a genius.

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Lev Raphael is the author of the comic mystery Hot Rocks and 24 other books in genres from memoir to suspense.