THE BLOG
12/01/2011 02:13 pm ET Updated Jan 31, 2012

'Tis the Season to Consider Your Reason!

In real estate, it's all about location, location, location! And in real life, it's all about perspective, perspective, perspective!

So, what's yours? Do you know for sure? Let's find out, shall we?

I'm going to pose a series of questions, the answers to which many people don't even want to consider, let alone face. These are questions, whether you have thought about them consciously or at a more sub-cortical or unconscious level, whose responses can define you, direct you, even can control your thoughts, feelings and actions. So think carefully before you read on and do the required work. Because if you do, well, one does not come away from a self awareness exercise like this without being unchanged in some fashion. Perhaps it will result in the increased self-esteem that comes from appreciating a well-considered life and all the rewards associated with it, or perhaps it will open your mind to a more realistic and grounded way of thinking about yourself and the world, or perhaps it will surprise you and facilitate new perspectives and great changes in your life.

Only you can decide.

For each question, whenever possible, write down five responses and be sure to write the first thing that comes into your head whether it seems to make sense or not. Please do record your answers so that you can reflect upon them and look for patterns.

Here we go, remember to breathe...

What really matters to you and how would someone observing your behavior know that it matters?

What are you willing to risk anything for?

What motivates you?

What rewards you?

What triggers fear in you?

What are you afraid you cannot have?

What are you afraid you cannot do?

Who are you afraid you cannot be?

What are you afraid that you are not entitled to?

Do you "talk back" to your fears or do you treat them as facts and allow them to control you?

Is each day an adventure or a chore? Why?

What "beliefs" (fixed notions that you are not allowed to question and that you will defend against information to the contrary) do you have about yourself?

What "beliefs" do you have about others and the world around you?

Do any of these "beliefs" substantiate and fuel your fears?

To what do you attribute these "beliefs" and how do they serve you?

What do you think your life would be like without your "beliefs"?

What do you think your life would be like without your fear?

Who is in possession of your "truth" -- is it you or some other person or organization?

Do you "own your power" (your ability to consider your thoughts, feelings and actions independently and with your "whole brain") or do you give it away to someone or something other than yourself? If you do, to whom and why do you give it?

If you were to die today is there anything that you would leave unfinished or unsaid?

How do you want your epitaph to read?

If you answered these questions you have worked hard and whatever your responses I applaud your courage and willingness to be self-aware. If you found anything in your answers that is scary, unnerving or that evokes sad or negative feelings or that has disturbed you in any way please talk about it with someone you trust and/or seek out a licensed professional counselor. You can find a therapist by consulting reputable sites on the internet, your insurance provider list, getting a referral from your physician, perhaps a recommendation from a good friend, a clergy member or by consulting your county's mental health association. There is no need to feel embarrassed or uncomfortable about doing so. After all, if there was something wrong with you car and you didn't know what to do you would go to a certified mechanic and have them take a look under the hood; psychotherapists basically function in the same way. We are cerebral "grease monkeys" if you will, and our job is to give you the tools you need to operate the mental/emotional "vehicle" that is your life safely and without mishap.

Facing ourselves, really considering our decisions and having the courage of our convictions is challenging. However, doing so can change not only your life but the world itself, one idea at a time, one person at a time.

It's true you know, in real estate, it's all about location, location, location! And in real life, it's all about perspective, perspective, perspective!

I wish you joy, peace and lots and lots of wisdom, love and magic!