THE BLOG
08/15/2014 03:26 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

The Lady Is A Champ: How One Fashion Journalist Rewrote Her Tale Of Victory

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As a fiercely competitive female--with no one in particular but myself--it's incredibly reassuring to learn that victory is a woman. A goddess, actually, if Greek lore serves me correct.

Victory comes baring gifts--laurel wreaths, glory, and all those pleasantries for the champs--but it's her feminine form that makes me believe that winning is preternatural for us ladies; that, in fact, we were born to finish first.

It should come as no surprise, though, as this past year alone every female impresario has been advising me to "lean in", "thrive", make some "hard choices", be "bossy", and most importantly, wake up looking "flawless". I've adhered to these pathos to the best of my abilities, piecing out the best ideologies that suit my life as a writer, but sometimes it's difficult to lead the pack--any pack.

I may be breaking with industry code by airing my feelings of self-doubt, but as a fashion and cultural writer I am constantly flooded with apprehensions and neuroses over my work, my ability. Am I saying enough? Am I producing enough? Am I making any type of effectual change with my work? There is always that gnawing feeling that what I've produced has fallen short. According to no one but myself, my content has to balance this really precarious line of wit, intellect, and know-how--normally at 3 a.m., no less, with a deadline looming in the horizon--making victory either appear just within my line of sight or just out of my grasp. This, coupled with the fact that as a woman of color writing for mainstream audiences, each word used is a delicate balance. Each word applied must dodge stereotypes concerning my capabilities, my smarts, and my depth.

I don't believe I am very unique in this--writers have been toiling for centuries-- but I don't think it's really about not succeeding that obstructs the "creative process", but what happens when we do. It was only befitting then that Pour La Victorie--a brand, who at the helm of Artistic Director Cameron Diaz, encourage women through their personal journeys--gave me the opportunity to speak on how I get to the other side of victory. View my victory, below...