03/18/2010 05:12 am ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

Keeping Score in Chicago Episode 28: Dear Oprah, LA Is For Suckers

No matter what the soccer moms say, Chicago will not fall into Lake Michigan if Big O packs up her self-help circus and heads to LaLa land. Sun-Times columnist Bill Zwecker gives the scoop on what people are saying about Oprah's diabolical plan to sell out Chicago and cuddle with celebrities and skinny people in California.

The guys give props to Mark Brown's scoop of the year: How to get your speeding ticket tossed out of court. Plus, Sammy Sosa confesses to corking himself. Another round of Speed Score and more. Cuddle up with a MoonPie and enjoy.

Be sure to check out Keeping Score in Chicago for more information and previous episodes.