06/15/2011 08:48 am ET Updated Aug 15, 2011

Movie Review: Green Lantern

Let's see: In the new Green Lantern movie, yellow is the color of fear. Green is the color of will.

So what is the color of tedium?

Well, green and yellow are a good start.

This is the summer's third comic-book movie but hardly the last one. I feel as though I need to post a running list of preferences, so readers will know where something ranks. Because really - most of these movies can't really be judged on any other scale except: Well, was it better than the last one?

But I don't need to do that with Green Lantern, since it's the least interesting of the summer's graphic-novel entries so far. It's a lot less involving than Thor - and shouldn't even be mentioned in the same sentence as X-Men: First Class.

Green Lantern suffers from a terminal case of origin-osis, the disease that infects super-hero movies forced to explain a character's origin. These movies tend to putter around for most of the film just waiting for the designated protagonist to discover that hero inside of himself. Yeah, sure, he's been chosen for one reason or another - but he doesn't really believe it until it's almost too late. Almost.

By that point, however, it's far too late for the audience. In the case of Green Lantern, you get an hour and 45 minutes of foreplay and then 15 minutes of action. Sure, there are a couple of moments that threaten premature pleasure - but Martin Campbell's movie (from a script by four writers including Dawson Creek's Greg Berlanti) never threatens to pop its cork for real.

Click here: This review continues on my website.