10/22/2013 12:41 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

She Was a Great Mother, a Great Wife, a Great Leader

A few years ago I had the privilege of sitting with Jim Loehr, an amazing personal performance Coach down in Florida. He was helping prepare/coach me after I had my first son Matthew, helping me navigate and find it in me to get back to the office and make being a working

I had no clue what to expect but something we discussed had a profound impact on me, something I talk about and think about often, in fact almost daily. He asked me a simple and yet quite morbid question...what do you want it to say on your tombstone?


Admittedly it's not something I had ever put thought into but within seconds I responded by saying the this:

"She was a Great Mother, a Great Wife, a Great Leader" it was so instinctual to me, I wanted to be great for my baby, my husband, myself /my company.

He paused, and then proceeded to challenge me...he asked me, "What if it said Great Mother and Great Leader, would that be enough? What about Great Wife and Great Mother? Could 2 out of 3 be enough for you?"

No, it wouldn't I told him. He smiled and said he liked it, it's a great tombstone...but do you know how difficult this is going to be? But if there is any place that can help you do's Next's Charlie Kim.

Yes, I feel fortunate to be part of a company, a culture that embraces helping new mothers, working mothers. Has it been easy? No, but we are working on it and it's working.

Could I say that if I died tomorrow this tombstone statement would be true? least not every day! But it guides me daily to make sure that I don't give up on any one part, they are all important to me.

Ultimately, I'm not sure if this statement could be written on my tombstone...but I will die trying

The post originally appeared at Next Jump.