08/24/2014 07:17 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

I've Finally Decided to Leave You!


I've decided to confirm rumors of the breakup of my long-term relationship by publishing the following letter in full:

Dear AT&T:

You've had me fooled all these years, telling me you've had my best interests in mind, but you've failed to keep up with my needs, despite my heartfelt pleas.

Sure, you give unlimited data to those who've known you for a long time, but for me, a relative newcomer to your circle (although we've been together many years now), you deny me.

After much soul searching, I am leaving you for T-Mobile. They offer a truly unlimited talk, text and data plan for less than you've been charging me during our increasingly limited relationship.

Plus, T-Mobile will travel the world with me for free (international text and data roaming are included). Sure, if I take voice calls when abroad there's a per-minute charge, but who talks to anyone on the phone anymore? Besides, I can avoid these voice charges when outside the U.S. by forwarding my number to voicemail, or better yet, to a Skype number - which I can answer on my device at no charge using the unlimited data which is part of my plan!

And with good credit, T-Mobile will spread the cost of my new phone over 24 months with zero interest (because their interest in me is so great). Or if I want, I can bring my own device to the relationship.

And finally, as I walk down the aisle with T-Mobile, I'll be using the Samsung Note (it is rumored the Note 4 will be unveiled September 3, 2014) which, because of the screen size (I am a size queen after all), eliminates the need for a tablet (which would bring with it its own set of charges).

All this time you've led me to believe you're all that, but as I've explained, you no longer meet my needs, and you have proven yourself unable and unwilling to adapt to who I've become.

So while it's been good, it's time for us to part (when my contract expires in late September).

I will remember you fondly, or not.

Sort of Sincerely,

Nicholas Snow

To My Readers:

Yes, I've taken the time to write this as a mock break-up letter, but it comes after extensive research, including recent phone calls with both T-Mobile and AT&T, and I wanted you to benefit from what I've learned.

T-Mobile offers a truly unlimited talk, text and data plan with included, international text and data roaming, for less than I've been paying AT&T for a limited data plan and fairly expensive international rates. (If you don't mind a slow-down in data speed, then the unlimited talk, text and data plan is only $50 a month. It's that $30 add-on that gives you the same high speed data ("Truly Unlimited") with no upper maximum on how much data you use at a high speed).

I'm going the $80-a-month route because I'm a Netflix binge-watcher. Also, I spend a lot of time in Thailand (and am planning much more international travel) where I want to be able to maintain my usage without having to take on additional devices and charges.

And now you know!

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