New York, NY - Mayhem has spread throughout much of the Middle East, following revolutions in Egypt and Tunisia, which, in light of new evidence, could be a result of a United Nations peace and love memorandum that went missing on its way to the region.
In keeping with a theme of love and tranquility on Valentine's Day, the United Nations today issued a memo to all countries in the world. The memo urged sectarians, religious extremists, political opponents and other warring factions to lay down their arms and give each other hugs if the mood struck.
The UN says that the version of memo intended for the Middle East was lost by the United States Post Office. A mail carrier made a scheduled pickup at 760 United Nations Plaza 11 a.m. this morning, but the memo never arrived at its destination.
"This is a perfect example of the inefficiency of the government," said House Speaker John Boehner. "You think this would have happened if the UN had used FedEx?"
The United States Post Office confirmed pickup at 760 United Nations Plaza but maintains that all scheduled deliveries to embassies in New York were made. Relative peace in the rest of the world appears to support that claim.
Meanwhile, violence continues between dissidents and authorities in Iran, Bahrain, Egypt and Yemen. An already precarious area of the world, the Middle East has been shaken by the revolts driven by middle class youth in several countries in the region. The fate of these countries may be even less certain now than it has been in years past.
"No, we didn't get any peace and love memo," said a badly wounded protester in Yemen. "It would have been nice to know."
Violence resumption memo scheduled for 11 a.m. pickup tomorrow morning.
Originally featured in http://dailypygmy.com/