April Fool's Day is supposed to be a time of rejoicing for satire. The closest thing comedy gets to a religious holiday, outside of Purim. The problem is, sometimes things get handed you on a Silver Platter that transcend easy, so far beyond that it's simply not fair. It's like shooting fish in a soup bowl. (Example: that could have been, "It's like shooting your good friend in the face on a quail hunt.") Which faux-story do you choose to write? So many deserving targets, so few fingers with which to type them.
In the end, it's just too much for only one day. Because too often it seems like April Fool's Day is every day.
White House Withdraws Troops from Iraq, Mission Actually Accomplished
Residents Flock Back to New Orleans Three Decades Ahead of Schedule
Canada Builds Border-length Wall to Keep Out Americans
Secret Bush White House Tapes Discovered on iPod
G.O.P Exonerates Bill Clinton
Sunnis, Kurds and Shiites End 1,000 Years of Discord with Barbecue
Child Passes Test, Only Three Still Left Behind
Vast Right Wing Conspiracy Revealed
Democrats Agree on Something
Bill Frist Sued for Malpractice in Schiavo Case
Missing Florida Ballots Found from 2000
Republicans to Hillary: "Please Forgive Us"
China Writes Off $700 Billion U.S. Loan
Definition of "Is" Found to Be More Confusing Than Previously Thought
Hole in Ozone Layer Fixed
Karl Rove Accidentally Bugs Own Office
Missing Ohio Ballots Found from 2004
President Nominates Harriet Miers for Fake Supreme Court Position
Environmentalist Activists Declare Selves An Endangered Species
Tom DeLay Named Most Photogenic Inmate
Home Video of Dick Cheney Hunting Trip on eBay
Entire Female Population of South Dakota Leaves
Grover Norquist Drowns in Bathtub
Old National Guard Records Uncovered, Bush Declared AWOL
Dems Put Paul Hackett Back on Ballot in Ohio
Decimal Point Mistake, Budget Deficit only $90.0000000000
Greenhouse Gas Proven To Be Alternative Energy Source
Ron Silver Returns to Democratic Party
Halliburton Admits Ties to Iran and North Korea
Drug Cartel Admits Ties to Halliburton
Fox News Admits Ties to Drug Cartel
Baby Seal Killers Admits Ties to Fox News
Matt Drudge Admits Ties to Baby Seal Killers
Homer Simpson Admits Ties to Matt Drudge
Chicago Cubs Win World Series
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