05/03/2015 04:35 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

The Plight of the Mother of the Bride (and Mother of the Groom, Too!)

Mother's Day is just around the corner, and as I began reflecting on my own relationship with my mother, I decided to take a look at mothers of my most memorable couples, as well.

My mom has always, and will always, be my biggest advocate, supporter, and champion whenever I achieve a measure of success. She'll also offer counsel, guidance and support when I'm not showing my best side. That is why I love her, and she returns the favor.

Mothers of the Bride and Mothers of the Groom (MOB and MOG respectively) often get a bad rap in the wedding industry. They're sometimes seen as overbearing, ridiculous and uneducated in terms of what it takes to produce a wedding. If the mothers aren't contributing financially, this scrutiny inside the industry, as well as their children, increases. Our event planning firm, Gray & Associates Events, has worked with some pretty extraordinary MOBs and MOGs, and we have also seen our fair share of perceived spotlight stealers, but the one common thread that bonds all of these women together, is that they all gave birth to a child who is fixing to enter into a lifelong commitment with another person.


Photo Courtesy: DC Stanley Photography

While they might not always get their opinions or advice across in an optimal fashion (who does?) 99.99 percent of them are offering suggestions from a place of love, and a strong devotion to ensuring their child has the most amazing day and celebration humanly possible within their means. That is an enormous amount of pressure to be placed on one individual! Mix that with the thought that this is the last step, their child has gone through school, possibly college and grown to be a wonderful human being, and now, they're placing one of the final pieces into the puzzle, marriage.

In this stage of my life, I'll never fully know the thoughts and emotions that run through a mother when she's about to support her child entering into his/her wedding day, but I can certainly empathize with these women. My clients often ask me to talk to their mother about decisions pertaining to the wedding because, they're dealing with a Mother of the Bride or Groom for the first time, while we deal with several different ones on a yearly basis. All of the mothers have opinions, all of them have ideas, all of them have criticism, but they all also have something else, an unbreakable will to love their son or daughter, regardless of if they choose roses or peonies for the centerpieces.

Cherish your mom, and cut her some slack; she was probably the first one who taught you how to love unconditionally.