THE BLOG
06/06/2008 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

Forty Years of Groovy Single Gals

I don't think of any of us who, in 1968, felt like rare kayakers pushing off from the known continent called You Had To Get Married Right After College could imagine that 40 years later there'd be a stiletto stampede to see the film poised to exponentially phenomenize the already-branded notion that single, sexual women are an enviable species. That's because back then -- when Joni Mitchell was elegizing her 15th St. half-floor-through in "Chelsea Morning," and Carly Simon was moving into the Murray Hill walk-up where, she's said ,"I hated to sleep alone and because it was the Sixties I never had to," and Carole King was leaving a New Jersey tract house and husband for sexy Laurel Canyon -- we were just a few years away from novels (not just Rona Jaffe's but Keroauc's) that painted unattached female non-virgins exactly one color: desperate.

What would those first-generation Quixotes -- the Girls Like Us, if you will -- have done if, in 1968, they'd accidentally (bad Owsley?) time-zoomed to some strange America where guys typed, huge corporations ("Google"? "Yahoo"?) had been named by Wavy Gravy, and music rebels preened on red carpets like Rock Hudson and Doris Day. And: What if today's Blackberried, 401-k'd babes, crackling-with-self-referential jargon -- the Sex and the City-ites -- were tasked with devising a Power-Point imagining template for their quaint, Qaunt'd foremoms in their exposed-brick lairs.

Here -- along the lines of a French/English, English/French Pocket Webster's -- is a brief two-way translation, just in case.



















Sex and the City-to-Girls Like Us Dictionary
Category
Sex and the City
Girls Like Us
(1) LARGE, ROUND, FLAT, WHITE, REGULARLY INGESTED ITEM
Chevre mound on frisee salad
Enovid birth control pill
(2) BODY ART
Small-of-back butterfly tat
Hairy armpits
(3) PREGNANCY
Condition befalling your friend who caved, married, and moved to Westchester
Something you faked, by way of girdle in which you smuggled hash out of Afghanistan
(4) DATE
Rite male invites female on; sleeping with same on first of which Carrie ponders efficacy
Oblong candied foodstuff, popular in holiday baskets
(5) WARDROBE FROM:
Marc Jacobs
Paraphernalia
(6) ZINGY ONE-LINERS SUPPLIED BY:
Sanford Blatch
Timothy Leary
(7) WITTY GAMBIT THAT BACKFIRED
Carrie strutting on the catwalk during Fashion Week
Grace Slick bringing Abbie Hoffman to her Finch College reunion
(8) PRISSY DEB WITH BIG HOTEL WEDDING
Charlotte
Tricia Nixon
(9) YOU-GO-GIRL LAY SOCIOLOGIST
Carrie
Isadora Wing
(10) NO-CRAP-TAKING LAWYER CHICK
Miranda
Bernardine Dohrn
(11) IMPERIOUS BABE WHO SLEPT WITH EVERYBODY
Samantha
Linda Eastman
(12) JOCK CRUSH
Derek Jeter
Sandy Koufax
(13) EXPLETIVE-BIFURCATED MALE WAR WHOOP
"Abso- f---ing - lutely!": Big, in Episode One
"Far - F---ing - out, man!:"Crosby, Stills and Nash roadie, any time
(14) BOYFRIEND'S FAVORED FORM OF TRANSPORT
Car and driver
Marrakesh Express
(15) HOST WITH MOST
Amy Sacco
Mickey Ruskin
(16) CLOSETED HUSBAND
played by Nathan Lane; marries Bitsy in Hamptons
Jann Wenner















Girls Like Us-to-Sex and the City Dictionary
Category
Girls Like Us
Sex and the City
(1) OUTRAGE INDUCED BY:
Getting gonorrhea in Third World country
Being broken up with on a post it note
(2) PHILOSOPHICAL TRUISM
"I really don't know love at all"
"He's just not that into you"
(3) MONO-MONIKERED EMO MAN
Donovan
Berger
(4) OVERRATED CROWD-MAGNET
Woodstock
Magnolia Bakery
(5) LURKING IN BUSHES EVERYWHERE:
Narcs
Frenemies
(6) MOST INEXPLICABLE MATE-DUMP
Benjamin Braddock two-timing Elaine for Elaine's mother, Mrs. Robinson
Miranda ditching Dr. Robert Leeds (Blair Underwood) to go back with Steve
(7) MALE NOVELIST WHO INADVERTENTLY LAUNCHED THE SCENE
Leonard Cohen
Jay McInerney
(8) "SHOE" + "ADDICTION" IS A:
Non sequitur
-priori
(9) BACHELORETTE PAD MUST-HAVE
Incense owls
500-thread-count Pratesis
(10) A BRIEF HISTORY OF CHICK-GROUPS:
Gen One: The Chantels, The Cookies, The Shirelles
Gen Two: The Crystals, The Ronettes, The ShanGriLas
Gen Three: Martha and the Vandellas, The Marvelettes, the Supremes
Gen One: Gloria Vanderbilt, Oona O'Neill, Carol Matthau
Gen Two: Mary, Rhoda and Phyllis
Gen Three: Carrie, Miranda,Charlotte and Samantha
(11) CELEBRITY GIRL CRUSH
Julie Christie
Gwyneth Paltrow
(12) DEALING WITH BEING SINGLE BY CHOICE
"With a heart that's full and hollow, like a cactus tree"
With acceptance, power, camaraderie, laughter ... and a shit-load of Cosmopolitans