11/26/2013 09:01 am ET Updated Jan 26, 2014

Ahead of Thanksgiving, Nation's Mothers Very Concerned You Might Be Getting Sick

MINNEAPOLIS - With another Thanksgiving weekend only days away, mothers across the country are once again preparing to latch onto even the tiniest sniffle as proof that you're getting a virulent cold. Covering a range of festive scenarios, from you sweeping leaves off your parents' front lawn, to you taking in your nephew's outdoor football game, your mother is poised to notice even the slightest cough or runny nose, and immediately whisk you to an area hospital. Additionally, your mother has reportedly spent weeks rehearsing key expressions "You need to take better care of yourself" and "How much sleep are you getting?" in an effort to shame you and your immune system into a heightened state of readiness.

Reports that your mother has already begun "warming up some soup; just eat something, you look so thin" have not yet been confirmed.

This post first appeared on Steve Kenning's website,